


Pas De Deux

by orphan_account



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, But it gets better I swear, Cheating, Drama & Romance, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Epic Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Gary Mitchell is a dick, Gaslighting, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Jim's life sucks, Manipulation, Mild Smut, Past Child Abuse, Pining, Team as Family, eventual Jim/Bones
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-11
Updated: 2017-05-01
Packaged: 2018-08-12 13:44:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7936942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James T. Kirk got away from an abusive homelife to go to college and get his degree. It's in one his classes that he meets Gary Mitchell, who he starts dating. Jim doesn't feel that he's ever had anyone love him in his life, so he's blind to the signs of an unhealthy relationship, even when his friends start to point them out to him. Will he realize what Gary truly is before it's too late?</p><p>Leonard McCoy is studying to become a doctor, but he knew his plans for a quiet college life were doomed when he met his roommate Jim Kirk. Things only get more complicated when he develops a crush-if you could call this feeling a crush-on Jim, but Jim is currently in a relationship that he's too deep into realize is abusive. He just hopes he can protect Jim from getting too hurt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was a hot day out. The sort of day that happens when the weather hasn't quite made its mind up as to whether it's summer or autumn yet. James T. Kirk and his roommate/best friend Leonard "Bones" McCoy had decided to spend their Sunday afternoon in relative relaxation. Bones was still in bed at two in the afternoon, he'd only gotten up for coffee, food, and to retrieve his laptop from the other side of the dorm. Jim was sitting cross-legged at the foot of his friend's bed, his nose in a dog-eared, paperback copy of Kurt Vonnegut's  _Player Piano_. They sat in a comfortable silence, one that was only interrupted by the clacking of Bones typing, and the smooth woosh of Jim turning a page in his book. 

Bones paused his typing momentarily, taking in the quiet that was around him. Silence like this was difficult to come by, especially when sharing a dorm with Jim Kirk. It reminded him of the library, but with more of a sense of home. The only thing that could make the scene better, in his mind, would be a homemade mint julep in his hand. He sighed softly.

"Hey," Jim said, breaking their comfortable silence just as Bones had begun to type again. The clacking of the keyboard came to a stop again as Bones looked up at Jim, silently reflecting on the fact that the quiet in the dorm couldn't have lasted much longer anyway. "Bones, I'm bored. Let's go to In'N'Out."

"In'N'Out is horrible for you," Bones commented, resuming his typing as he spoke. He had to finish this email to one of the professors before he could agree to go anywhere with Jim, even a dump like In'N'Out. "Besides, how can you be bored? I thought you liked Vonnegut?"

"I do, just not for three hours."

Had it been three hours? McCoy looked down to the clock at the bottom of the screen, only just then realizing it was two in the afternoon. It wasn't like they had plans today, but he hadn't realized the time had gone by so quickly. He didn't want to waste the one day he had left before class tomorrow. He quickly signed off the email and sent it to the professor, then shut off his laptop as he looked back to Jim. "Fine, we can go somewhere," he said, earning a cheery grin from his roommate. Bones knew he wouldn't win the battle, but he decided to make an attempt anyway. He added, "But does it have to be that fast food crap?"

Jim chuckled as he searched the mattress for where he had set his bookmark. He found the torn off corner of some notebook paper and stuck it between the pages of his book. As he gently tossed the paperback onto his own bed, he said, "Yes, it has to be that fast food crap."

Bones rolled his eyes. It had been exactly the answer he was expecting. Sighing in resignation, he shut the laptop and got up to find some clean clothes to change into. He was about to be a doctor, and he'd be damned if he went anywhere in public in his pajamas. "I don't understand," he commented as he swapped his ratty pajama shirt for a semi-clean (it smelled clean, anyway) blue button down, haphazardly rolling the sleeves up to his elbows. "Why you can't just have a salad every once in awhile."

"You know I don't trust green foods," Jim said defensively, and McCoy wasn't sure if the indignation was real, or feigned for humor. 

"That's ridiculous," he replied.

"I'll get lettuce on my cheeseburger. Let's go."

He shot Jim a disapproving look, which Jim matched with a shit-eating grin. "That doesn't count," Bones said, beginning to slip his shoes on all the same. "You know that doesn't count."

"It counts," Jim said, ducking out the door. 

Bones found himself rolling his eyes again as he followed Jim out the door, still grumbling about dietary discourse.

~~

It was a fifteen minute walk from campus to the In'N'Out Burger. Jim had texted an invite to a few of their mutual friends on the way there, and Bones had to stop Jim from walking directly into traffic once, then he had to stop him from walking into a street light twice. But, aside from that, they got there without much incident. A few minutes later and they were gathered around an outdoor table with Uhura, Sulu, and Scotty. 

"Hey, Bones," Jim said suddenly. 

McCoy swallowed the bite of salad that he'd been chewing and turned to face Jim. "Yeah?"

"Wanna hear a joke?"

"No."

"When does a doctor get angry?"

"No."

"When he runs out of patients!"

There was a chorus of long-suffering groans from the group sat around the table, the only ones who laughed at the joke were Scotty, and Jim himself. A smile threatened to tug at the corners of Bones's mouth, but he managed to maintain his unimpressed expression. It wasn't even the pun he thought was funny, the pun was horrible. But Jim laughing at his own bad joke? That was endearing, not that Bones would ever admit that out loud. "I can tell you when a med student gets angry," Bones replied, to which Jim raised his eyebrows expectantly. He should know better, by now, than to expect a pun from Bones. "When their friends tell them really shitty puns."

"That's not exclusive to med-students," Uhura commented, stealing a couple of fries from Jim's tray as she spoke. He swatted her hand away in an unsuccessful attempt to stop her stealing his food, and she laughed. "Hey, how're things going with Gary?" she asked.

Gary was Jim's boyfriend as of somewhere around two months ago. They met in their Chemistry class so Jim liked to joke that they had "chemistry together," but at least a third of their relationship was spent fighting. Not even playful bickering, which a lot of couples did, but full on arguments. Bones didn't get why the two of them didn't just break up already, but he had the tact not to ask. It looked like they were currently in another argument, though, as Jim scowled at Uhura's question. "Fine," he said unconvincingly. 

The others around the table exchanged looks, apparently also having made the same observations as McCoy. "I've seen that look before," Sulu said, looking slightly amused. "What'd he do this time?"

"What? Nothing," Jim said, indignant. "Why do you think he did something?"

"Fine," Sulu said, mirroring Jim's tone and expression from a second ago. 

Scotty and Uhura smiled at the impression. "Aye, you weren't exactly subtle, Jim," Scotty said through a mouthful of cheeseburger. He paused for a second to swallow his food, then added, "What was it?"

"Nothing," Jim repeated with a sigh. He took a sip of his drink, then shook his head, obviously still frustrated by whatever they had argued over. Just when Bones was starting to think they'd have to ask again, Jim huffed and leaned his elbows on the table. "It's just...You guys have all met Gary, right? How long ago did I introduce you to him?"

"A few weeks after you started dating," Uhura said, frowning. 

"Two weeks," Bones supplied, wondering why that could matter. Scotty and Sulu nodded that that sounded about right, and Jim nodded, as if that had proven some point to him. Bones asked, "Why?"

"Cuz, I wanna meet Gary's friends," Jim said. "Tomorrow it'll be two months we've been dating, and he still hasn't introduced me to any of his friends. It's like he's embarrassed of me or something, and when I asked him about it, he said they were 'busy,'"-he did air quotes with his fingers on the word  _busy_ , then crossed his arms irritably-"But  _all_ of his friends can't be busy, so that's obviously not true."

Uhura made a face, indicating that she agreed with Jim. For a second, Bones tried to picture what she would do if Spock refused to introduce her to his friends, but that wasn't an argument he wanted to imagine. Sulu frowned as he took a bite of his salad, then suggested, "Maybe he's not out to his friends yet? It'd be kind of awkward if he hadn't told any of them he was into guys, then introduced them all to his boyfriend."

If the look on Jim's face was anything to go by, he'd already considered that option, and didn't think that was the case. "Then why wouldn't he just tell me that, instead of letting me be mad at him?" he said. "I don't know, maybe it's my fault."

That was a habit of Jim's that tended to upset McCoy. Jim liked to blame anything and everything that went wrong on himself, and it broke McCoy's heart. He sighed, setting down his fork and turning to his friend. "How in the hell could it be your fault?" he asked.

Jim had just opened his mouth to answer when the air was suddenly filled with  _Brass Monkey_ , the song by the Beastie Boys. Bones and Scotty actually jumped at the sudden noise, but Jim didn't seem surprised as he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out his cell phone. Bones didn't appreciate the new ringtone, which is apparently what that noise had been. "Sorry, hang on," Jim said to them, holding up an index finger as he turned away and answered the phone. "Hello?"

The voice on the other end was too quiet for Bones to tell who it was. He could just barely hear them talking, but he could distinguish Jim's name, and the person asking where Jim was. "I'm at the In'N'Out off campus, why?" Jim asked. There was a minute of silence, presumably while the other person answered, and then Jim nodded, even though whoever it was obviously couldn't see him. "Yeah, I'm sorry, too," Jim said softly. Another stretch of quiet. "How about five?" One more pause. "Love you, bye," Jim said, smiling again as he put the phone back in his pocket.

"Was that Gary?" Uhura asked, smirking. 

Bones was glad to see that, this time, Jim grinned rather than scowled at her question. "Yeah," he said, nodding slightly and picking up a couple of fries from his tray. "He wanted to have dinner later." 

"You aren't arguing anymore?" Scotty asked, brows knitted in confusion. McCoy understood the confusion, seeing as the phone call hadn't lasted more than a few minutes, so he didn't see how it had fixed anything. "Just like that?"

"I mean, I'm still annoyed he won't introduce me to his friends," Jim said, shrugging his shoulders lightly. "But I don't  _want_ to be mad at him, so we'll just have to work it out later."

Uhura clapped her hands together with a joyful smile. "Perfect," she said, earning a few intrigued looks from the others around the table. She explained, "It's why I asked about him in the first place, I wasn't gonna say anything if you were fighting, but now that you're getting along again. Spock and I are going to a party next weekend, and we wanted to invite another couple to come with us, sort of like a double date. Think you and Gary could make it?"

Jim returned her smile with one of his own. "Sounds like fun, I'll ask him tonight," he said. "I'll text you later."

"Fantastic," Uhura said. 

"Hey, why didn't you invite me and Ben?" Sulu interjected, shooting Uhura an indignant look.

"Because the last time I invited you to a party, you spent the whole time lecturing the host about how she wasn't taking enough care of her house plants," she replied flatly, stealing another couple of fries from Jim. 

"Whatever," Bones said, shaking his head. "Relationships are overrated anyway."

"I hear that," Scotty replied, putting his hand up for a high-five. Bones rolled his eyes, but he high-fived him anyway. 

Sulu chuckled and said, "You two only think that 'cause you're not in one."

The remark earned a laugh from Jim and Uhura, and even a grin from Scotty who, admittedly, had been single for over a year. Bones knew it was true, he would probably have a better perspective on relationships if he had someone to date. But the only person he was interested in was seeing someone, and he didn't think he was ready to admit he liked this person yet anyway. He wasn't about to tell any of them this, though. "If y'all are content to have your happiness depend entirely on someone else then that's your business," Bones remarked, taking a sip of his soda and wishing that it was something alcoholic instead. "But I don't want anything to do with that."

"Optimistic as ever, Bones," Jim commented with a teasing smile. 

"Someone in this group has to be the realist," he answered. 

"You sound like a mother," Uhura said.

This wasn't even the first time one of them had joked about McCoy behaving like a mother. It was a running joke amongst them that every group has a "mom friend," and apparently Bones was it. He didn't find it as funny as the rest of them did, but taking care of these idiots meant being a mom friend, that was just fine by him. "Yeah? Well then you're all grounded," he said.

Jim whined overdramatically and threw his head onto Bones's shoulder. "But mooooommmmmm," he said childishly, dragging the word on until he was out of breath. 

Bones tried not to laugh at that, but when he glanced down at his shoulder and saw Jim's imitation of an unhappy toddler he couldn't help himself. Jim tried to maintain the childish expression for a few seconds, but when McCoy started to laugh, he began to laugh along with him. Soon the whole table had dissolved into a giggling fit. Once they had all quieted down, Bones said, "You're still grounded."


	2. Chapter 2

About two hours after the In'N'Out trip and Jim and Bones were back in their dorm, more or less having switched places. Jim sat with his laptop open, typing up a research paper, and Bones got started on reading the assigned pages in one of his medical text books. After a brief debate with Bones, Jim had plugged his phone into a mini-speaker, and it was currently playing a song by The Killers. Jim sang along under his breath as he typed, until Bones complained, at which point he sang along even louder, and deliberately off key. Bones rolled his eyes.

When the hour hand on their clock was a little closer to five, Jim shut off his computer and went to get ready to his date with Gary. He swapped the ketchup-stained shirt he was wearing for a red knit sweater that was comfortably too big for him, but decided the jeans he had on would do. Then he ducked into the bathroom to comb his hair. By then the song playing on the speakers had changed, and Jim beamed as House of Pain's  _Jump Around_ came on. Bones complained about the noise, and Jim's taste in music, but Jim was sure he'd seen him drumming his fingers to the beat.

The song was only halfway through when he stepped out of the bathroom, looking around for a second when he didn't immediately see Bones sitting at his desk. Instead, he was standing at their door, holding it halfway open. Apparently Jim hadn't heard the knock over the sound of his music. He saw Gary standing in the doorway, dressed in a worn out denim jacket and a black v-neck. Jim grinned and moved to shut off the music, unplugging his phone from the speaker and putting it in his back pocket.

"I told you that music was too loud," Bones said, turning away from the doorway and dropping back into his desk chair. "Didn't even hear the damn knock."

Jim laughed as he grabbed his jacket and started towards the door, slipping his arms through the sleeves as he walked. "You like my music and you know it," he insisted, then turning away to face Gary with a bright smile.

"Hey, babe," Gary said, pressing a kiss to Jim's lips. Jim made a small noise of surprise, as Gary usually didn't kiss him in front of people, but he returned the gesture. They only separated when Bones told them to get a room. Gary gave a light chuckle and murmured, "Your friend's a grouch."

"He's my grouch, be nice," Jim answered quietly, giving Gary a quick peck on the cheek. 

"Do you two have any idea how many germs the human mouth carries," Bones said disapprovingly. 

Jim laughed, looking over his shoulder at Bones. "You didn't seem to care about that when you were with that lab technician," he said, laughing some more at the indignant look on his friend's face. "What was her name again?"

"Just shut up and go," Bones replied, turning back to his text book.

Still smiling, Jim made a quick farewell to Bones and started out the door with Gary. He heard Bones shout, "Use protection!" as he shut the door, and both he and Gary chuckled. They started down the hallway and towards wherever Gary had managed to park his car in the usually flooded campus parking lot. Jim glanced over at him as they walked and asked, "So, what're we doing tonight?"

"Each other, hopefully," Gary said, looking back at Jim with a playful grin. 

"Feed me, then we'll talk," Jim joked back.

Gary breathed out an exaggerated sigh. "Ugh, so needy," he said. "Fine. We can order takeout, maybe watch a movie. How's that sound?"

"Who picks the movie?"

"Me."

"Fine."

~~

Gary didn't live on campus, but it was only a ten minute drive to his apartment building, then up a couple flights of stairs to his actual apartment. It was bigger than a dorm room and Gary actually had a t.v, but the real perk was that Gary didn't have a roommate, so they spent a lot of their time at Gary's apartment. Around fifteen minutes after they got there and they were sitting comfortably on the leather couch in the living room. Gary had one arm draped over Jim's shoulders and his feet propped up on the coffee table, and Jim was leaning heavily into Gary's side with his legs stretched out across the rest of the couch. Both of them had chinese takeout boxes in their laps. Netflix was open on the t.v, but they couldn't seem to agree on what they wanted to watch.

"How about  _The Princess Bride?"_ Jim said when he spotted it in their suggestions box. He'd already seen it a hundred times, but it was probably one of his favorite movies, and he's never watched it with Gary before. 

"Nah, that's dumb," Gary answered flatly. 

"I like it," Jim said with some slight indignance.

"You're dumb," Gary said.

"Guess you can't copy my Chem homework, then," Jim countered, settling more comfortably into Gary's side and taking a bite of his sweet and sour chicken. Gary glared at him, then looked back at the t.v, silently continuing to skim through the movie selections. After a stretched out minute of silence, Jim sighed and glanced back up at the screen. Nothing there immediately leapt out at him. "Fine, what d'you wanna watch?"

"What's your least favorite movie?" Gary asked.

"Probably  _Galaxy Quest_ ," Jim answered after thinking about it for a second. It was a funny movie, but he didn't think the plot made very much sense. He couldn't explain why, but he always felt kind of like he was being insulted whenever he watched it. "I hate that movie so much."

There was a brief pause, then Gary said, "I wanna watch  _Galaxy Quest._ "

Jim sighed. "Of course you do."

Gary didn't answer, he just moved the screen up to the search bar. "Let's see...G...A...L..." he said as he typed the movie title into the search bar. Jim made an objection that didn't quite make its way into a word, just an annoyed sound, and tried to snatch the remote out of Gary's hand. He moved his arm out of the way before Jim could get the remote, though, and continued to type. Despite having to move the remote to ridiculous angles to keep it out of Jim's reach, he somehow managed to keep spelling out the movie title. "Q...U...E...Oooh, there it is!"

"Nooooo," Jim whined as Gary moved the pointer down to select it, making one last desperate attempt to steal the remote. They were both laughing as Jim grabbed Gary's wrist and tried to pull it, and the remote, back towards him.

"C'mon, Jimmy, you said I could pick the movie," Gary said, turning away from the screen once again to look at Jim.

There was a moment where he didn't feel like he was in the apartment anymore. He didn't like to be called Jimmy, he'd mentioned that to Gary before, but Gary seemed to forget it a lot. The only person who had ever called him Jimmy was his step-dad, Frank, and the nickname made him remember parts of his childhood that he would really rather not remember. His head replaced being in Gary's apartment with being in the house he grew up in. A vivid memory played in his head, one that involved Frank, a bottle of beer, and a baseball bat. 

He flinched suddenly, and the apartment began to meld back into focus. Jim blinked a few times before realizing that Gary was staring at him, waiting for a reply to something. He wanted to answer, but he couldn't remember what they had been talking about. It had all gone out of his head when he heard the name Jimmy, and half of his brain was still thinking about that memory. The other half was focussing on Gary's hand, which was waving in front of his face. Jim cleared his throat and said, "What?"

Gary sighed irritably, as if he had just been horribly insulted. "You were doing that thing again," he commented, setting the remote down on the arm of the couch with an aggressive huff.

Jim shook his head, the slamming sound the remote made helped him finally focus back on the present. "What thing?" he asked, glancing at the remote and then back up at Gary's face. His eyebrows were drawn into an angry scowl, an expression he'd been wearing increasingly often lately. Jim didn't want Gary to be mad at him, especially when he wasn't sure what he'd done to deserve it. 

"The zoning out thing," Gary said, pulling his arm out from behind Jim and pushing him away a little. He folded his arms across his chest. "I thought I told you to stop doing that."

"Sorry," Jim said, feeling a pang of guilt in his chest. It wasn't like he could control his 'zoning out thing.' In fact, it wouldn't happen if people just didn't call him Jimmy, and most people just remembered that he didn't like that particular nickname. Most people just called him Jim. Still, he know it upset Gary when he did it. "Didn't mean to."

"Sure, whatever," Gary replied, sighing again as he turned his attention back to the television. Jim frowned and followed his gaze back to the screen. There was a second of pause, then Gary abruptly turned to look back at Jim. "It's just, I don't get why you do that. There must be something seriously wrong with you. Am I not interesting enough or something? I'm so boring you have to zone out?"

"It's not you," Jim said hastily. "You're not boring, that's not it."

"Then what the hell is your problem?" 

"You just reminded me of something else, that's all."

"Oh, so it's my fault?"

"That is not what I said," Jim argued. He didn't know how he always ended up on the defensive whenever he tried to talk to Gary. Every conversation was like walking on eggshells, and he somehow always failed. He started to pick at the edges of the takeout box in his lap. 

Gary just shook his head. "Yeah, whatever," he said, turning once more to the t.v. "My mind's made up, I wanna watch  _Galaxy Quest._ "

Jim agreed reluctantly, "Fine." He figured agreeing to a movie was the least he could do after zoning out again, as he really didn't want to fight with Gary anymore. They'd just made up from a fight earlier, he wasn't eager to start another one. "We can watch it, I guess."

Gary chuckled dryly. "Don't sound so enthusiastic," he said.

Jim took in a long breath, trying to keep from starting another fight. "You picked it because I told you I hated it, how do you want me to sound?" he answered, frustration starting to leak into his tone. 

He saw Gary clenching his fists in anger and instinctively moved a little further down the couch. His response just seemed to make Gary even angrier, as he slammed one of his fists into the arm of the couch, causing Jim to flinch slightly. "Shit, Jim, I didn't realize you hated me so much," Gary said, his voice just beneath a yell. "All I wanted to do was watch a movie with you, but apparently we can't even do that without you screwing it up."

"I don't hate you, Gary," Jim insisted.

"Well you sure do your best to make me think you do."

"You're the one who said there was something wrong with me."

"No, I didn't."

"Yes, you did!"

"That's not true. Where do you come up with this stuff?"

Jim started to reply, then paused for a second. Gary didn't sound like he was being sarcastic, he sounded completely serious. But Jim was sure that he'd heard him say that. He started to wonder if maybe he was remembering their conversation wrong. It was less than a minute ago, he couldn't have gotten things that mixed up. "I heard you," Jim started, the anger in his voice replaced somewhat with confusion. He'd argued with Gary before about things like that, that Gary insisted he'd never done. "At least, I thought I heard..."

Frowning, Gary slowly moved closer to Jim's end of the couch. "I didn't say that, Jim, I would never insult you like that," he said, raising his eyebrows earnestly. He reached a hand out and grabbed Jim's chin, tilting his head up and looking him in the eyes. "Hey, would I lie to you?"

Jim shook his head slightly. "Maybe I misheard you," he replied, wondering what Gary had actually said, then. He inhaled deeply and then very slowly breathed out. "My fault, I guess."

"As usual," Gary said. "God, you're difficult to love sometimes."

"I don't mean to be," Jim answered, trying to ignore the sadness that those words invoked. It wasn't the first time that somebody had told him that, and he doubted that it would be the last time.

"Hey, doesn't mean I don't love you anyway," Gary said. 

"I'm sorry," Jim said for the second time that day. He wished he didn't find himself apologizing so much. "I should go."

He started to get up, but Gary stopped him. "Jim, you're not going," he insisted, pulling him back onto the couch. "I don't wantyou to go. C'mon, let's watch a movie."

Jim was a little relieved to sit back down, as it meant Gary really wasn't still angry. He cautiously moved a little closer and, when Gary didn't push him away, leaned against Gary's side again. Gary chuckled and draped his arm back around him, picking the remote up again and pressing a button. The screen returned the the movie selections, and they started to skim through the options once more. 

" _Jurassic Park_ ," Jim suggested. 

"Nah, just watched that last week." 

" _Moulin Rouge!"_

"Not on Netflix, remember?"

"Oh, yeah... _The Boxtrolls?"_

"Isn't that a kids' movie?"

"Only if you hate fun."

"Babe, we're not watching it."

"Fine."


	3. Chapter 3

By Thursday of that week, the weather had drastically become more like autumn. Bones hated it, but Jim seemed to think it was a blessing. When Bones woke up that morning to the sound of the door opening and closing, Jim was standing there wearing a stupid beanie and a cheery grin, apparently overjoyed by the autumn weather outside. How he could even be smiling so early in the morning was beyond Bones, and Bones must've accidentally said that aloud, because Jim laughed. He rolled his eyes, spotting two cups of coffee in Jim's hands. "That better not be that pumpkin spice crap," he said.

Jim laughed again, shaking his head as he crossed the room to hand one of the coffees to Bones. "Well, mine is," he said, plopping down to sit on McCoy's bed, not seeming to care that he had to sit on Bones's legs to do it. "Yours is just black coffee."

"Thanks," Bones grumbled, holding the drink close to his face and breathing in the warmth of it. 

Jim moved a bit so he could cross his legs, taking a large sip from his own drink and then wincing a bit. He never once made sure his coffee was cool enough before drinking it, and he burned his mouth every time. Bones had commented on it a hundred times before, but Jim never learned. In fact, he took another sip less than a second later anyway, despite the coffee having had no time to cool at all. Bones sighed and shook his head, not awake enough to be making sarcastic remarks just yet. 

"Guess what?" Jim said enthusiastically. 

"I don't play guessing games 'till past nine," Bones said, gesturing slightly to the clock on his nightstand. The screen displayed, in electric blue, 7:24 AM. He reflected that it was a terrible number, and Jim should have at least waited until 7:25 to wake him up. At least make it an odd number.

Jim wasn't deterred by McCoy's grouchy response, though. He imagined that Jim was used to the attitude by now, they'd been roommates long enough. "Someone filled the entire B Hall with grasshoppers, so all the classes there are cancelled," Jim explained, bouncing up and down with excitement. He paused to take another sip from his coffee, apparently not burning himself this time, and grinning at Bones. 

They both had five classes on Thursday, and four of Jim's were in B Hall. Bones only had three in B Hall, but that was still a lot of classes to be cancelled in the same day. His first class was still happening, though, so it meant that he couldn't go back to sleep. He didn't see why it mattered if he couldn't go back to sleep. "So I spent all that time last night doing a last minute essay for nothing?" he asked blankly.

He might have smiled at the unimpressed face Jim made if he wasn't so tired. "Technically, yes," Jim said, nodding every so slightly. Then he held up an index finger, as if he was about to make some incredibly important point. "But, do you know what that means?"

"I can nap later?" Bones supplied. That wasn't likely, it seemed like Jim had somehow already made plans for the day, within like half an hour of finding out that classes had been cancelled. Stupid Jim and his stupid extroverted tendencies, why couldn't he just appreciate a day off with napping and Netflix?

"Even better," Jim said, booping McCoy's nose and ignoring the irritable look that McCoy gave him. "It means, my grouchy, sleep obsessed friend, that we're crashing a wine tasting with Uhura, Christine Chapel, and maybe Gary."

"What d'you mean  _crashing_ a wine tasting?" 

"I mean we're going to one, but we weren't technically invited."

"Remind me again why I'm friends with you?"

"C'mon, Bones. Free alcohol, that's right up your alley," Jim replied, offering Bones another sunshiney grin before hopping off the bed to go plug his phone into a charger on the other side of the dorm. Bones couldn't argue with that point, except that he preferred a lot of other kinds of alcohol to wine, and there was a good chance of them getting into trouble. So, he could argue with that point, actually. "Uhura and Christine already agreed, and they'll be disappointed if you don't come."

Bones took a long swig of his coffee, already knowing that he would end up going along with Jim, but deciding to debate it anyway. "Isn't crashing an event better if you have a smaller group?"

Jim sat down on top of their shared desk, despite there being a perfectly good chair in front of it for him to sit in. "Which is why they won't suspect anything," he said. It wasn't a very convincing point, but he said it with a lot of confidence, and Bones almost believed him. "Besides, it'll be way more fun if we pull it off, since we're taking the riskier route. So, free alcohol, risk, fun, and friends. Are you in or what?" 

"Fine," Bones said. "It's probably better if you have a chaperone for your shenanigans anyway."

~~

Jim and Uhura made everyone change into either a suit and tie or a fancy dress before they left, and they all piled into the back of Christine's minivan. Everyone made sure Jim couldn't sit in the front, as he had an annoying habit of changing the radio every five seconds. So Uhura called shotgun, Christine drove, and Bones, Gary, and Jim got stuck sitting in the back seats. The drive was a bit longer than Bones had expected, but before he knew it, they were standing in the middle of a high society wine tasting room. He still wasn't sure how Jim had talked the doorman into letting them in, especially now that he saw just how high class the place was.

It was obvious after the first two wines that they tasted that Uhura and Gary were the only ones, aside from the people who had actually been invited, that knew what they were talking about. Gary was a stereotypical rich kid, so it didn't surprise Bones that he could keep up with those wine snobs, and Uhura was just far more cultured and sophisticated than anyone would ever really know.

"I prefer a good bourbon," Bones murmured to Jim after handing a glass back to one of the servers.

"Well, it's nothing to  _wine_ about," Jim said. When Bones turned to look at him, Jim was offering him the biggest shit eating grin that could fit onto his face. 

"I hate you," was all Bones said in response, and Jim laughed like Bones had told him some incredibly witty reply. 

"You're going to get us caught if you keep laughing like that, Jim," Gary snapped. Jim stopped laughing immediately, but Bones thought he heard him mutter something irritably under his breath. No one else heard it, though, so Bones decided not to say anything.

Three more wines later, and McCoy was growing increasingly surprised that they hadn't been asked to leave. He and Christine were at least  _trying_ to sound like they knew what they were talking about, borrowing fancy sounding phrases from Uhura and the other guests. Bones had even managed to hold up a conversation with one of the strangers there for a couple of minutes. Meanwhile, Jim sipped every wine with the same sophisticated attitude that the other guests had, and said, "Mmmm, grapey," after every single one he tasted. Every. Single. One. 

This time the server gave him a strange look for it, but didn't say anything as he walked towards the other guests. They had the restraint to wait until the server was out of hearing distance before Jim, Uhura, and Christine burst into heavy laughter. Bones chuckled along with them, though he tried to be quieter so as not to draw attention to their group. "Grapey," Christine repeated, clearly out of breath and grabbing a stitch in her side. Uhura had begun to stop laughing, but she collapsed into giggles again when Christine repeated it. McCoy shook his head as more laughter escaped from his lips. 

"Shut up, shut up," Uhura said suddenly, indicating something behind Jim with a tilt of her head.

They all sobered up quickly, turning to see that a pair of the other guests were coming towards them. It was a middle aged couple, a man with a peppered beard and expensive looking suit, and a redheaded woman with a flowy blue dress. "Gary Mitchell, is that you, darling?" the woman said as they approached, her voice a sort of forced sophisticated. She had an accent of some kind, but Bones couldn't pinpoint where it was from. The group turned from her to Gary, who looked mildly surprised to see her.

"Mrs. Alcott, Mr. Alcott," Gary said politely, offering them a smile that Bones thought seemed strained. "It's been so long. How are you?"

"Wonderful, dear," the woman, Mrs. Alcott, said. Her eyes flickered over the group, then landed back on Gary. "Aren't you going to introduce to your friends, dear?"

"Certainly," Gary said, nodding. "This is Miss Uhura, Leonard McCoy, Christine Chapel, and James Kirk."

"Such a handsome group," Mr. Alcott remarked. "Are you all students?"

They all nodded. Bones noticed that Gary spoke differently to this couple, his voice sounded a lot more like a rich kid's and even his body language was more formal. "They're all in the top of their classes, actually," Gary pointed out, almost sounding smug. "James is especially smart, he actually skipped his freshman year of college."

"Since when do you call me  _James_ _?"_ Jim asked, quiet enough that it seemed like it was intended for just Gary to hear. The Alcott's didn't seem to notice, but Bones did. Gary subtly elbowed Jim in the side, otherwise not answering. 

"Bright young man," Mr. Alcott said. "Why do I feel like I've heard the name before?"

They knew the name because most people in the country did. Jim's dad, George, was basically famous. Everyone referred to him as a national hero because he died on Jim's birthday while preventing a terrorist attack. He was a hero, he managed to save thousands of lives, but Bones knew that it was an uncomfortable subject for Jim. People tried to talk about it all the time on campus, and Jim always either snapped at them, or just got up and left the room. Bones had picked up a habit of deflecting the questions before Jim had to, so he said, "It's a common name."

"Not that common," Mr. Alcott said. 

"Are you related to George Kirk?" Mrs. Alcott asked suddenly, recognition on her face.

"Yeah, he was my dad," Jim said. Bones thought he did a good job of covering up his discomfort, the only reason Bones noticed it at all was because he was looking for it. 

Mr. Alcott glanced at his wife with curiosity. "Was that the one whose memorial we visited in June?"

They talked about it like George was a thing, not a person. It made McCoy's skin crawl, and he couldn't imagine how Jim stopped himself from starting a fight right then and there. Gary turned to Jim with his eyebrows raised. "You didn't tell me your dad had his own memorial," he said, a hint of a question in his voice. Bones thought Gary should know Jim didn't like to talk about his dad, seeing as they'd been dating for two months already. 

"Never came up," Jim said, crossing his arms. 

"I don't see how it never came up, I would boast like no tomorrow if  _my_ dad was a national hero," Gary said. He turned back to the Alcotts and added, "James is so humble, you would never know he's a genius."

"Stop it," Jim said, voice sounding playful, but Bones thought he detected some discomfort in Jim's features. Then, in what Bones saw as an effort to change the subject, Jim asked "So, how do you two know Gary?"

"We're old family friends," Mr. Alcott said.

"We lived next door to Gary while he grew up," Mrs. Alcott added. "We're quite glad to hear he hasn't been hanging out with the wrong sort. So many kids these days don't behave too well in college, you know."

"What do you mean by the wrong sort?" Jim asked, a little defensively.

Mrs. Alcott looked a little uncomfortable with the question, like she had been expecting them all to just agree with her without questioning. Another server arrived before she could answer him, which was probably for the best. They were each offered a glass of some new flavor of wine that was a darker color than the one they had just tasted, but didn't seem that much different to Bones. The Alcotts sipped it delicately, then exchanged looks with each other. "I believe this is a bit too tangy for my preferences," Mrs. Alcott stated.

"It would be finer if it had been fermented a bit longer," Mr. Alcott said.

"I agree completely," Gary said.

Jim raised the glass to his lips and drank it all in one sip, making a thoughtful face then announcing, "Mmm, grapey."

Uhura managed to hide her giggling behind her hand, and Bones just barely suppressed his own laughter. Christine nearly choked on her wine, swallowing and then joining Uhura in trying to hide her amusement. The Alcotts looked like they were simultaneously offended and confused as they looked at Jim, eyebrows slightly drawn towards each other. Gary cleared his throat and shot Jim an angry look. 

There was a stretch of silence that couldn't have lasted more than a couple of seconds, but it felt much longer, and then the Alcotts excused themselves to go talk with the other guests. They were barely gone before the group, once again, collapsed into obnoxious laughter, with no regard to where they were. Except for Gary, of course, who was glaring at Jim as if Jim had committed some abhorrent crime against him. "What the hell, Jim?" Gary said in an irritable whisper, like he wanted to shout but wasn't because of the setting. 

The amused grin on Jim's face dropped immediately as he looked over at Gary, and Bones could tell they were about to have another argument. He wondered if there was anything he could do to prevent the fight from breaking out, but realized it was too late as Jim opened his mouth to reply. "Come on, what'd I do this time?" Jim said, matching Gary's tone almost exactly. "It was obvious you didn't even like those two."

"Of course I don't like those two, they're pretentious dickheads," Gary snapped.

"Yeah, you're telling me," Jim said with a scoff. 

By then the others had stopped laughing too, their faces the same mixture of concern and awkwardness that Bones was sure his face showed. It was always awkward watching a couple fight, but it didn't seem like there was even sufficient cause for a fight this time. Bones glanced away from Jim and Gary to look at Uhura, silently asking her whether or not they should get involved. Uhura seemed to read the look on his face well enough, because she slowly shook her head. Bones made a face to tell her he didn't completely agree with the assessment, but turned to watch the argument without interfering. 

When he looked back, however, neither of them were saying anything to each other. They were just glaring, almost as if they were daring the other to make another comment. After a second, Gary snapped, "Let's just talk about this later."

"Fine," Jim said. 

Gary struck up a conversation with Christine, though it seemed a bit awkward and uncomfortable. Bones sighed and took a step closer to Jim, debating about what to say or not say. He was saved from having to think of something, as Uhura leaned in and whispered, "We can leave, if you want."

Jim shook his head, his expression settling into one of stubborn determination. "We're sticking to the plan," he said, putting his hands on his hips. Bones was not aware of any plan, and he looked at his friend with cautious confusion. "We don't leave until we're kicked out."

"That is a terrible plan," Bones said flatly.

"I knew you'd say that," Jim said, nodding to himself. "That's how I knew it was a great plan."

~~

They were nearing the end of the wine tasting, and Jim was growing more restless as the evening went on. Bones wasn't sure if the behavior was from how much wine they'd been drinking, or the fact that they hadn't been kicked out yet, and that was all Jim wanted from the event. About four of the other guests had, for some reason, brought themselves over and were trying to make conversation. Bones started to think they might get kicked out after all when one of the men that had joined them tried to flirt with Christine by slipping an arm around her waist and grabbing her ass.

Christine looked uncomfortable as she stepped to the side a bit, but the man stepped in the same direction, persistently keeping his hand there. Bones wasn't sure who looked angrier, Jim or Uhura, but he was sure he did not want to be that man. Jim grabbed the man's arm and jerked it away from Christine, twisting the man's wrist around until he winced in pain, coming dangerously close to breaking it. "You best apologize to the lady or-" Jim started to say. He was cut off as Christine stepped up and clocked the man right in the nose. 

The man stumbled backwards, only held up by Jim's grip on his wrist, and Uhura cheered loudly. Her being proud of her friend decking someone didn't surprise Bones, nor did the proud grin that Jim gave Christine. 

The man found his way back to his feet and started towards Christine, pulling his arm back and swinging a punch. It missed by a few inches, as Jim was holding him back, so the man turned to Jim and tried to hit him instead. Bones had seen his friend get into a lot of fights before, but he still felt nervous when the man's fist connected with Jim's face and Jim fell back a few steps. Jim countered by slamming his knee into the man's stomach, effectively knocking the man backwards and onto the floor.  

Uhura calmly walked over to where the man way lying on his back on the floor. "Start respecting women," she said, spilling her wine glass onto him and then stalking back towards the group.

Before anyone could do anything else, three security guards burst into the room. They were, Bones thought to himself, a little late. "Here we go," Bones said under his breath. They would be getting kicked out of the wine tasting after all, even if it wasn't exactly how he had predicted they would. 

Behind him, Bones heard Gary murmur, "I can't take him anywhere."

And then they got kicked out.


	4. Chapter 4

After getting kicked out of the wine tasting, everyone just stood around in the parking lot for a few minutes before deciding they'd had too much wine to drive safely. Uhura suggested they walk to the diner they'd driven past on their way there, as it was only a few blocks away. Bones insisted on taking Christine's First Aid Kit from the minivan and looking over Jim first, which Jim complained about, but everyone else agreed was a good idea. 

"He didn't even hit me that hard," Jim whined, sitting down on the hood of the car. 

"Then why is your nose bleeding?" Bones countered, folding his arms with an unamused expression. If Jim's head wasn't spinning, he might have argued the point a little further. "You need to sit up straight and tilt your head forward."

"Aren't you supposed to tilt your head backward?" Someone asked. Jim didn't catch who because, when he did tilt his head forward, he got distracted by a sort of pretty leaf on the ground. Wine drinking and getting punched didn't exactly do wonders for a person's concentration. 

He heard Bones grumble, "I'm sorry, I wasn't aware  _you_ were the med student?"

When Jim's nose had stopped bleeding-more or less-everyone trekked down to the diner Uhura had mentioned. They found a booth in the back corner and dropped onto the faux leather seats. Jim sat in between Bones and Gary, and Uhura and Christine sat across from them. Jim reflected that this wasn't exactly how he'd expected their outing to go, but it had been an adventure nonetheless. He relaxed into his seat and announced, "We should get kicked out of places more often. That was fun."

"That was not fun," Bones said. 

"I had fun," Christine said, beaming.

"Yeah, you did," Jim replied, sitting up a bit so he could high-five her across the table. "Where'd you learn to punch like that, anyway?"

"I taught her," Uhura chirped proudly, also high-fiving Christine. 

"Of course you did," Bones said, a very small smile pulling at his lips. "That was a thing of beauty, even I'll admit."

Everyone chuckled for a minute or two, making comments about what a sleaze that guy was and stuff like that. They were all very excited when the waiter brought them their food, an assortment of various kinds of cheeseburgers, and salads for Bones and Christine. Jim was talked out of ordering a soda, and they all collectively decided to drink water instead. 

~~

They spent the better part of an hour at the diner, storytelling and laughing. Then they piled back into the minivan and started on the drive back. Gary gave Jim the cold shoulder the whole time, which made Jim's stomach knot. 

When they pulled over to drop Gary off at his apartment, he shot Jim a pointed look, and Jim reluctantly unbuckled his seatbelt to get out with him. He said a quick goodbye to everyone else, then followed Gary into the lobby of the apartment building. The lobby was basically empty, and as soon as the door was shut, Gary grabbed Jim by the arm and started dragging him towards the stairs. Jim followed after him, almost tripping a couple of times. "Uh, Gary?" Jim said, only receiving stony silence as a reply. "Gary? You're hurting my arm."

Gary didn't answer, nor did he let go of Jim's arm. If anything, his grip tightened as he yanked Jim up the stairs and then down the hallway. He unlocked the door, practically shoved Jim inside, and then slammed the door behind them. Jim just barely stopped himself from falling over, and he flinched a the sound the door made. He was expecting Gary to yell then, but when he did speak, it was closer to a whisper. "Jim, what the hell was that?" he said. Then, a little louder, "What the  _hell_ was that?"

"I'm not entirely clear what you're mad over," Jim answered, rubbing his arm lightly. He thought it might bruise.

"Where should I start? First, you embarrass me in front of family friends-"

"Yeah, ones that you  _don't even like._ "

"Don't interrupt me, you piece of shit."

"But you admitted you don't like them."

Gary threw his hands up in the air in frustration, coming just short of yelling when he said, "That's not the point, Jim."

"What is the point, then?" Jim asked, raising his eyebrows expectantly. He might have dropped the issue and apologized already if Gary would just tell him what the issue even was. It wasn't like he was deliberately picking a fight with his boyfriend. 

Taking a step forward and holding his index finger up, almost like a threat, Gary said, "Stop it, Jim, I'm warning you."

It was a phrase that Jim had heard more often than he would like--and not just from Gary--and it never ended well for him. Suddenly, he wished he had just gone home with Bones, or that he was anywhere else but the apartment. And he actually felt guilty about the anxiety growing within him, he was supposed to trust Gary, he wasn't supposed to be afraid of him. Still, he wasn't about to just shut up because someone told him to. "Just," he started, then stopping himself and taking in a deep breath. "What is the point, Gary?"

"The point is, we can't do anything without you fucking it up!"

"Oh, and you're innocent in all of this?"

"What did you just say to me?"

Jim ran a hand through his hair, but he wasn't sure if he did it out of frustration, or because it was a nervous habit he'd developed. He was both at the moment, nervous and frustrated. Fighting with Gary always made him nervous. "I'm just saying, for someone who claims those two were dicks, you seem to care an awful lot about their opinions," he said, trying to keep the vexation out of his voice. 

It didn't work. 

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"C'mon, you spent how long using me like some thing to boast about to them? Then you had to go and bring my dad into it, and you know I don't like to talk about him."

"Oh, please. You  _want_ people to bring up your dad, you just like to act all humble about it. That's your whole act, the fucking boy scout who's too down to earth to talk about his heroic dad. You do it for attention, everyone knows that," Gary said, still not quite shouting but not talking either. Jim opened his mouth to argue at that, but Gary cut him off before the words could even form. "You know what, it's probably because you need the attention, right? 'Cause you know you'll never be as good as George Kirk, it's a reputation you can't live up to, so you-"

"Knock it off, Gary," Jim said, surprising himself with how cold his voice came out. "You know that's not true."

Gary laughed. He did that sometimes when they were fighting, and it usually made Jim really uncomfortable. Jim found himself rubbing at his arm again, mentally reminding himself that Gary wouldn't hurt him on purpose, physically or with the remarks about George. He didn't think he could deal with any of that right now, though, it was just too much. Jim took in a deep breath and said, "I have a paper to write, maybe we should work this out later."

He started for the door, but he only got a couple of steps before Gary moved in front of him to block the door. "Don't walk away when I'm talking to you," he snapped. "We're having a conversation, you can't just leave."

Jim started to argue before he could think better of it, "I don't know that we're having a conversation, so much as I'm standing here while you insult me."

"I have not insulted you once, just because I said some things you don't want to hear."

"Gary, that's not-"

"Oh, so you're saying you don't feel like you're living under George Kirk's shadow?"

"Shut up."

"Why? I hit a nerve there?"

He didn't answer that, he just tried to sidestep past Gary to get to the door. Gary blocked him again, then casually leaned back against the door, like he was just relaxing there and not trying to keep Jim from leaving. Jim rocked back on his heels, clenching his jaw in frustration. Both of them just stood like that for a few seconds, until Jim finally said, "Can we get back on subject? Why don't you just tell me what the deal is with the Alcott's?" 

Gary nodded, but stayed where he was in front of the door. "You're right, this isn't about your dad," he said, tone returning to that unnatural calm that it had been when the argument started. "It's about what a piece of shit you were being at the wine tasting."

Jim breathed out a heavy sigh and ran his hands through his hair again. "You still won't even tell me what you're mad over-"

Gary cut him off again. He was beginning to get really annoyed at being cut off all the time, but he bit his lip and let Gary say what he was going to say anyways. "I'm 'mad,'"-he put air quotes over the word mad-"because you embarrassed me in front of the Alcott's, then almost made a scene getting pissy at me. Oh, then, after I'd told you not to embarrass me in front of family friends, you start a fucking fist fight right in front of them! How stupid can one guy be? Come on, Jim!"

He folded his arms and then unfolded them, becoming more nervous than frustrated when Gary started yelling. "That what I don't get, though," Jim started, trying pretty hard not to start yelling himself. "You admitted to not liking the Alcott's, so why does their opinion matter?"

"Why does my reasoning matter?" Gary countered. "If I tell you to do something, you should just do it. Why do you have to argue with me?"

"I don't think I'm the one that turned it into an argument," Jim pointed out. 

"Everything's always my fault, huh?"

"No, but this might be."

"Bullshit."

"Right, because the great Gary Mitchell never loses his temper unnecessarily," Jim said, voice heavy with sarcasm that, from the looks of it, Gary didn't appreciate.

His jaw tightened and he didn't say anything back for a couple of seconds. The silence just had the effect of stressing Jim out even more, and he really wished that Gary wasn't blocking his way out. The fights where Gary wouldn't let him leave were almost always the worst. But Jim was pulled away from that thought when Gary let out an angry puff of air. He said, "I don't get why you can't just accept that you fucked up."

Jim almost said, "Because I didn't fuck up," but he decided against it before the words could mess things up any further. He'd accepted a long time ago that most things that went wrong were his fault. Their last argument had, apparently, been Jim's fault. And he remembered that Gary had promised that he wouldn't lie to him. It occurred to Jim that, maybe, this whole thing had been his fault after all. He frowned and folded his arms in front of him, wondering how he always wound up ruining everything. Then he took in a long breath and decided to apologize, even if he still didn't know what he was apologizing for. He said softly, "You're right, Gary. I mess everything up, I'm sorry."

There was a long pause, one that probably felt longer to Jim than it actually was. Gary just looked at him through narrowed eyes, like he was trying to gauge the sincerity of what Jim had said. He seemed to accept it, because he gave a small little nod and pushed himself off the door. 

"Yeah, you seem to have a talent for screwing up," he said matter-of-factly, taking a small step towards Jim. He paused again, opening his arms and gesturing for Jim to hug him. 

Even if the words stung, Jim felt infinitely relieved at the relaxed tone in which they were said. Breathing out a small sigh, he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Gary, resting his head on his shoulder. Gary did the same. Jim whispered, "I really am sorry, Gary."

"It's okay, Jim," Gary replied, running his hand over Jim's shoulders reassuringly. After a second he added, "It's a good thing we met, though, 'cause I don't know anyone else who'd be stupid enough to love you."

And Jim didn't really have an answer to that, because he knew that it was true. So he just said, "Love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i meant to post this sooner, whoops. hope you liked.


	5. Chapter 5

Bones had woken up about five minutes before his alarm was supposed to go off. Not wanting to get up yet, he remained in bed for awhile, hoping to get a few more minutes of sleep before he inevitably had to start his day. His plans for a minute or two of dozing off were spoiled, however, by the sound of a door opening and closing. He didn't feel like opening his eyes yet, and he was grateful that Jim didn't turn on the lights. 

He was less grateful when a large weight dropped onto his bed, and a sing-song voice said, "Rise and shine, Bonesy!"

"Kid, why can't you ever let me sleep?" Bones grumbled, burying his face further into his pillow. He heard an inhale of breath that meant Jim was about to reply, but that was cut off by the sudden sound of McCoy's alarm going off. The irony of his alarm going off right when he was complaining about being woken up was not lost on him. As he blindly moved to shut off the alarm he said, "Not one word." 

"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious," Jim deadpanned. 

"I said no words," Bones said, words slightly muffled by his pillow. 

"Oh, I see. Last week during Scrabble it's not a word, but it is now that it's convenient for you," Jim replied, and Bones could practically hear the cocky grin on his face. He didn't want to reply, so he just held up his middle finger in Jim's general direction. Jim laughed at that before saying, "I have coffee."

Bones decided that was enough for him to get up. He rolled over and sat up, accepting the paper cup offered to him. True friendship, he decided, was having a person who brought you black coffee in the morning, despite how much of a grump you were. "I think I'm more coffee than blood at this point," Bones said as he cautiously sipped at the drink to make sure he didn't burn his tongue. Jim chuckled at the joke but didn't reply, and they lapsed into an easygoing silence.

McCoy was still pretty tired and he spent a couple of minutes just staring at the wall across from him, sipping coffee. Jim stood up to grab something from across the room, and that was when Bones really looked at him. He was wearing one of Gary's old t-shirts--Bones could tell because it had the Joy Division logo on the front and Jim didn't listen to Joy Division--and a pair of ripped blue jeans. His hair was a mess. That was all ordinary, what McCoy's brain dwelled on was the bruise on Jim's arm. The dark brownish purples and blues of the mark in stark contrast to his peach colored skin. 

Frowning, Bones set his coffee down on the nightstand and climbed out of bed. "Hey, where did that guy hit you again?" Bones asked, hoping he was more subtle than he felt. He knew Jim had only been punched in the nose at the wine tasting, but he was hoping he could get Jim to tell him about the bruise on his arm. 

Jim was plugging his phone into the charger by the desk when he answered, "Nobody  _nose_." He chuckled at his own terrible pun, but when McCoy didn't respond he sat down on top of the desk. (He never used the chair. Bones had given up on reminding him they had a chair.) He looked back at Bones, and Bones noticed that he looked tired, despite the cheeky grin plastered onto his face. "Hey, did it bruise? I haven't looked in a mirror yet. I'll bet everyone laughs when we tell them the story. Except Spock, he'll probably lecture us or something..."

His rambling sort of trailed off, and Bones took a minute to think how to answer him. Jim told him everything, so he couldn't figure out why Jim wasn't telling him where this arm bruise had come from. Bones had a suspicion, but he wasn't sure what the right way to address it was. He cleared his throat and said, "Well your nose isn't bruised, and I'll bet my amazing medical skills saved you from horrible disfigurement." 

"All you did was tell me to tilt my head," Jim replied, folding his arms across his chest. "And he didn't even hit me that hard."

"Whatever, kid," Bones said, reaching for his coffee off of the nightstand. He took a long sip and, not for the first time, found himself wishing that it was something alcoholic instead. "Point is, your  _nose_ isn't bruised. Your  _arm_ , on the other hand, definitely is. And I'm waiting to hear what the story is there." It hadn't been as subtle as he'd been hoping, but Bones never was good with subtlety. Jim was always joking about bedside manner, and the jokes weren't entirely uncalled for. But he needed to know whether his suspicion about the injury was true or not, because he needed to decide on a course of action. 

Jim just stopped for a second, as though he had forgotten about the mark on his arm and only just remembered because Bones pointed it out. Then he seemed to relax as he uncrossed his arms and leaned back a bit. "Not much of a story, really," Jim said, casually. But Bones had known Jim long enough to tell when his casual demeanor was for real or an act, so the comment wasn't convincing. If anything, it just made him think his previous suspicion had been accurate. Jim added, "We should get lunch with Scotty and Jaylah later. Arby's?"

It wasn't even a subtle attempt, Jim wanted to change the subject. Bones may not be as much of a people person as Jim was, but he knew people, and he could tell from the response that his suspicion was correct. He could also tell Jim wasn't going to talk about it, not right there, anyway. Bones would think of something, though. For now, he decided to go with what Jim wanted. "Arby's is only mildly less awful for you than In'N'Out, y'know?" 

Jim seemed relieved when Bones didn't call him out on his shit. "I don't think anything that tastes so good can be bad for you even remotely," he countered, smiling again."We could always get campus food instead? I hear they're close to figuring out what the mystery is in mystery meat." 

"God, no. Arby's it is." 

~~

They decided to invite a few others to lunch, but in the end it was just Scotty, Jaylah, Uhura and Spock who were free. They wound up sitting inside and they had to push two tables to fit their group together, but they had sandwiches and the radio was playing a David Bowie song, so they couldn't have been happier. That is, aside from Bones, whose thoughts were preoccupied with his friend's new arm bruise. 

The first few minutes of their lunch were spent recounting the story of the wine tasting. It was the connected kind of storytelling where Jim began to tell it, but Bones and Uhura both cut him off frequently to put in comments or remind him of important details. Scotty and Jaylah both loved the story, and they were good-humoredly upset about not being invited for the ride. Jim's earlier prediction about Spock's reaction had been more or less correct, too, as Spock shook his head disapprovingly and said, "I don't understand why you would go to an event where your only goal is to be thrown out of said event."

"Wrong," Jim said, around a mouthful of sandwich. "Our goals were 1) get free alcohol from event, 2) get thrown out of said event, and 3) have a lot of fun."

"We set goals and then we achieved them," Uhura said, smiling. "I thought you'd be proud of us."

"I am always proud of you, Nyota," Spock remarked offhandedly. 

"Get a room," Bones said, rolling his eyes. 

They laughed and then moved on to some other subject. It was Scotty and Jaylah's turn to tell a story, it seemed, because they started to recount how they had accidentally broken the elevator in their apartment building while trying to repair it. They hadn't gotten permission from the building owner to repair the elevator, either, and it sounded like they were lucky to still be living in the building. It seemed like a really good story, too, Jim and Uhura seemed to be enjoying it. But Bones couldn't focus on what they were saying at all, his attention kept wandering back to Jim's arm. 

It wasn't a particularly bad bruise. It would probably heal within the next two weeks, if Bones had to guess, and Jim had definitely had worse injuries before. But he shouldn't have had a bruise at all. How could anyone even hurt a guy like Jim? Sure, he was obnoxious and reckless, but he was also so kind and optimistic and he saw the good in everybody. Hitting Jim was like kicking a golden retriever puppy, in McCoy's opinion. 

He broke away from his thoughts when he heard someone say his name. Jaylah was smiling at him and she said, "Bones McLeonard, are you going to finish your fries?"

Despite his distractions, Bones smiled a little at the name. English wasn't Jaylah's first language, to be honest he didn't know what was, and she had a habit of turning people's names around into endearingly terrible nicknames. He shook his head and shoved the tray a little towards her. "All yours," he said, and he smile widened even more as she tugged the tray towards her and began stuffing curly fries into her mouth. 

"Hey, Jim, did you get into another fight and not tell us?" Uhura asked after a second. When Jim just tilted his head at her curiously, she gestured towards his arm, where the bruise was peeking out from under his t-shirt sleeve. Bones was almost glad Uhura had caught it, because he knew she wouldn't let Jim worm his way out of telling them. She said, "That looks like it hurt."

"S'not at bad as it looks," Jim answered, pausing to swallow his food before continuing. "It was just an accident, I'd tell you if I got in a fight."

Uhura looked from Jim to Bones, and Bones shook his head a little and gave a small shrug of his shoulders. She frowned at him and turned back to Jim, and she had just opened her mouth to say something, but Spock spoke before she could. "You are aware, of course," he said calmly. "That we have all known you long enough to tell when you're not telling the truth." 

Bones forgot sometimes how tactless Spock was. It looked like Jim forgot sometimes too, if his expression was anything to go by. Jim cleared his throat, rocking his chair back onto two legs. "Okay, that's fair," he said casually. He didn't say anything else, though. No explanation, no trying to defend what he'd said, just that. 

It wasn't the response Bones had been expecting, though he wasn't sure exactly what he had expected. He cleared his throat and folded his arms over his chest, turning his gaze from Spock to Jim. "So you did get in a fight?"

"Bones, you look like a disappointed mother, please uncross your arms," Jim said, a little smile playing across his features. Bones didn't smile back or unfold his arms, and Jim sighed, his own smile fading. Bones couldn't read the expression on his face. "Look, I didn't get in a fight, I promise. Can we drop it?"

"Not 'till you tell us how you got hurt," Uhura said, and Bones nodded in agreement. 

"Seriously?" Jim said, raising his eyebrows at them. He seemed frustrated, and Bones didn't want to pressure him into telling them what happened, but he had to know. He couldn't help if he didn't know what happened, and he tried to make his expression convey that all he wanted to do was help. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw that the others were nodding, too. "I don't really want to get into this right now."

Bones glanced back the others, but their faces were hard to read. They were quiet for a second before Jaylah spoke up, "James T, you know if someone hurt you we can beat him up for you, yes?" She nudged Scotty with her elbow. "Tell him, Montgomery Scotty."

Pushing away Jaylah's elbow, Scotty nodded and then held up his hands in fists in front of him. "Aye, we can be quite handy when we want ta be, y'know." 

Jim actually smiled, it was the first smile Bones had seen all day that seemed genuinely happy. His features softened a little and he said, "Guys, while your support does mean a lot to me, I don't need you to fight anyone for me. Everything's fine, okay? I promise."

Bones didn't think he was the only one who didn't believe Jim, but they all decided to let it drop for the moment. He supposed they were all thinking the same thing. That Jim was stubborn and wouldn't talk to them until he decided he wanted to. That pushing the issue might not really be helpful. That they could at least make sure he was happy for now before dealing with whatever it was he wasn't telling them. That they loved Jim Kirk and they just wanted to see him smiling. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so i haven't updated once a week like i'd hoped. (sorry) i've been busier than i thought, but i haven't abandoned the story, i'll try and update more regularly. anyway, thanks for reading! have a lovely night/day/whatever it is in your timezone!


	6. Chapter 6

"I haven't made any bad decisions in a while," Jim observed lazily. "I'm getting bored."

Bones made a noise that wasn't quite a word in response, but it sounded both disapproving and disagreeing. He was typing away on his laptop, and he didn't even look up from his paper to reply, "You make plenty of bad decisions, kid."

Jim was lying upside down on his bed, legs propped up against the wall and head just on the edge of the mattress, and he tilted his head back slightly to glance at his friend, trying to gauge what he was thinking. It had been just over a month since The Great Wine Crashing Incident--as Jim had dubbed it while telling the story to Chekov--and it was true, at least in his opinion, that he hadn't done anything particularly stupid since then. On top of that, he hadn't been spending as much time with his friends as he would have liked to. Gary had started getting jealous of all the time Jim spent with his friends and had sort of insisted they spend more time together as a couple. 

He looked away from Bones and directed his gaze back up to the ceiling, where the shitty glow in the dark star stickers had been put up months ago on their first day back. He tried to find constellations in them as he spoke. "I know I make  _plenty_ of bad decisions, but I don't make  _enough_ of them, Bones," he said, smiling to himself when he heard Bones sigh. "We should go to that holiday party at Gaila's."

"You understand why I'm going to say that's a bad idea, right?" Bones asked, the sound of his typing coming to a temporary halt. 

"Perfect, that's exactly the opinion I was looking for," Jim answered, smile widening. He tilted his head again, a little further this time just to make sure his friend caught the shit-eating grin that he threw in his direction. Bones looked over for a second, rolled his eyes like a long-suffering parent, then returned his attention to his laptop screen. Though, the typing sounds did not resume.

"We're going to the party, aren't we?"

"Yep!"

"Because I think it's a bad idea?"

"Yep!"

"Why did I pick you to be my best friend?"

"No idea!" Jim beamed, feeling far more satisfied at Bones calling him his best friend than he would admit out loud. He kicked his feet off the wall and clumsily maneuvered himself off the bed and into a standing position. It took him a second to locate where he had put his phone before he spotted it on his pillow, and he picked it up to send out a couple of texts. He smiled down at his phone as he typed and announced, to no one in particular, "This is gonna be so much fun."

* * *

Nine o'clock that night they found themselves on the front porch of Gaila's house. They, of course, being Jim, Bones, and Gary. Jim and Bones were in the middle of some playful argument when the door swung open and they were greeted by a smiling, sweater-wearing Nyota Uhura. She was holding a fruity looking alcoholic drink in one hand, and with the other she held the door, gesturing with her head for them to come in. "I didn't think you'd make it? Wasn't there a paper you were working on?" She asked, this directed at McCoy.

Bones nodded as they all stepped inside, Uhura shutting the door gently behind them. It was pleasantly warm inside, and festive lights and decorations were strung up around the house. "Yeah, well some blonde goofball had other plans," Bones replied drily. 

"Some hot blonde goofball," Jim corrected, giving a sarcastic wink in their general direction. Both of them rolled their eyes at him, but they also smiled, however reluctantly. "Place looks great, did you put up the lights or did Gaila?"

"Gaila," Uhura said. "I don't know where she found the time. Pretty sure everyone here should be working on some term paper or other."

"Ew, don't bring up homework, it's a party!" Gaila's voice called, as she approached the group with a wide smile. Her fiery red hair stuck out even more so than usual with the light up reindeer antlers she'd put on. "Glad you guys could make it! Drinks are in the kitchen, wanna take off your coats?"

They all took off their jackets and left them on the rack that Gaila indicated, then made for the kitchen to get some drinks. In the end it was just Bones that followed the girls into the kitchen, because Gary grabbed Jim's arm in a silent request for them to hang back a second. Jim frowned, wondering how he could have done something wrong already, but turned to see what it was all the same. He raised his eyebrows at Gary expectantly, waiting for him to say something.

At first he didn't say anything, he just grabbed the collar of Jim's shirt and pulled him into a kiss. That was unexpected, though not unappreciated. They pulled apart after a minute, but stayed just about an inch apart. Gary dropped his hand from Jim's shirt collar, finding where Jim's hand rested at his side and intertwining their fingers together. "Babe, can you do me a favor?"

Jim nodded. 

"Can you try and remember that you're my boyfriend and not Leonard's? Hm?" Gary said, raising his eyebrows in an expression that was only part annoyed. 

"I...uh-yeah?" Jim said, tilting his head to the side a little in confusion. He hadn't been expecting that, and he didn't exactly see where the comment had come from. "Did I do or say something wrong? Why...?" 

"Yeah, no, it's nothing," Gary replied, releasing Jim's hand in favor of running a hand up Jim's arm. He pulled Jim into another kiss and then said, "Just don't forget that you're mine." 

"Hey, lovebirds!" Gaila shouted, reappearing in the foyer before either of them had a chance to say anything else. She was holding a glass of what appeared to be eggnog in each hand, and she held the drinks out towards Jim and Gary as she approached. "Party's not just in the doorway, y'know? There's a whole  _house_."

"Are you sassing me, Gaila?" Gary asked, tone light as he accepted the glass she offered to him. 

"Please tell me this is alcoholic?" Jim said, also taking a glass from her. 

She raised an eyebrow at him and placed her now empty hands on her hips. "Who do you think you're talking to, Jim-bo? Of course it's alcoholic," she said, then smiling brightly. Jim smiled back as he sipped from the glass, and he quickly decided that the question would not have been necessary after one taste of the drink. Gaila was clearly not new to the practice of spiking the eggnog. But he was drawn from the thought as she started shuffling him and Gary towards the living room, saying, "Now go mingle with the other party pringles." 

Before Jim knew it, he was seated next go Gary on a flaking leather couch. The couch had been pressed up against the wall to make room for people dancing in the middle of the room. They were dancing to a song that Jim wasn't familiar with, but sounded like every song played at any club or bar with a dance floor. He took another sip of his eggnog, scanning the room to see how many familiar and unfamiliar faces there were. 

He and Gary just sat and talked for a little while, laughing and listening to the music. After a few minutes Hikaru and Ben joined them and they picked up a conversation pretty quickly. Hikaru was easy to talk to, and Ben was a total sweetheart. They made a nice couple. 

Jim paused halfway through a sentence when his phone buzzed, and he pulled it out of his pocket to see what it was. There was a text alert on the front screen. Gary leaned over curiously and glanced at the screen, reading the name and then raising an eyebrow at Jim. "Who's that?"

"The exterminator that's getting the rats out of my dorm room," Jim answered honestly as he quickly read the text. 

"You text with your rat guy?" Sulu asked, sounding slightly amused.

"Yeah, I don't know what boundaries are," Jim said with a laugh. He sent a reply and then stuffed his phone back into his pocket. "Don't tell Bones, he doesn't actually know about the rats yet."

"How do you hide a rat infestation from your roommate?" Ben asked skeptically, smiling as he stole a sip of Hikaru's eggnog. 

"With difficulty," Jim said. 

They all laughed and the conversation drifted easily into another subject. The four of them talked for a little while longer before Gary and Jim left the couch to go dance. 

* * *

By one in the morning, most of the guests had drifted out of the party and back home, only leaving the usual gang behind. They were all lounging around on the patio outside, their firepit bright and blazing, jackets and alcohol enough to keep the cold at bay for now. Hikaru and Ben were sharing a couch with Chekov and Bones, Gary and Jim were sharing the smaller couch, and Uhura and Gaila took up the armchairs. Scotty had decided to make himself comfortable on the floor. They were all bickering over whether they should play a game or not. 

Jaylah had gone to get more drinks, and she returned holding a tray of shots in one hand, and two bottles of something without a label in the other. They all turned to look at her when she returned and Jim asked, "Truth or Dare? Played out in high school, or still cool?"

Jaylah frowned as she set the shot tray down on the coffee table, dropping down to sit beside Scotty. She handed him one of the bottles she'd brought and twisted the cap off the other for herself. "I do not know, James T.," she answered after a second. "I have not played this game."

"Well that just does it," Jim said, admittedly melodramatic and a little too loud. "Jaylah, truth or dare?"

"Dare," Jaylah replied, skeptical but determined.

"Here we go," Bones grumbled.

"I dare you..." Jim paused, trying to think of a good dare. Then he jumped up in his seat with excitement as he thought of something. "I dare you to dive into the pool from the roof!"

"Don't do that," Bones said, sounding more unimpressed than anything.

"I will do that," Jaylah replied excitedly, then holding her glass in Scotty's direction and gesturing impatiently. "Hold my drink Montgomery Scotty."

Scotty took the drink and Jaylah wasted very little time in jumping to her feet and starting for the roof. There were a couple of murmurs about that being a bad idea, mostly from Bones and Uhura, but Jim and Scotty both got up to run after her, in the hopes of getting a better view. Jaylah had already scaled the wall by the time they got to the pool, her shoes laying abandoned on the pavement. 

In the end Jaylah did, in fact, dive into the pool from the roof, and she did a backflip to. Jim cheered her on loudly while Scotty laughed, and he thought it was Hikaru who clapped. Jim and Scotty both helped her out of the pool, and once she was back on dry land she also started to laugh. "I like this game," Jaylah said, accepting the jacket that Jim offered to her, and then accepting her drink back from Scotty. "Who is next?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm guessing my irregular updates aren't even a surprise anymore, but i'mma put an i'm-sorry-note anyway. thanks for sticking with the story! hope you had/are having lovely holidays!


	7. Chapter 7

Bones woke up to the smell of bacon and coffee, but even that enticing scent wasn't enough to get him to want to open his eyes. He fell back asleep shortly after that, and he wasn't sure how much went by before he woke up again. When he finally opened his eyes and sat up, he was momentarily shocked to find himself on an inflatable mattress in an unfamiliar room. Then he remembered that they'd all been too drunk to go home last night, and Gaila and Uhura had insisted that everyone stay the night in the guest room. Guessing by the empty bed and sleeping bag a ways off, Bones had been among the last to wake up. 

He finally crawled out bed and found his way into the kitchen, spotting Chekov and Scotty asleep on the couches as he passed. Jim, Gaila, and Uhura were in the kitchen making breakfast. Well, Jim was sitting on the counter and Uhura was scolding him for it, while Gaila was making breakfast. They paused when they noticed McCoy lingering in the doorway, and he was offered a couple of greetings that varied in enthusiasm. 

"I was starting to wonder whether or not you were still alive you slept so late," Gaila said with a laugh.

"Yeah, you're such a lazy  _Bones_ ," Jim commented, shit-eating grin already plastered onto his face.

"Hhmph," was all Bones said back. He didn't know what time it was, but it was still too early for terrible puns, and he was too hungover to make a clever comeback. He gratefully accepted the mug of coffee that Uhura offered him with one hand, using the other to try and rub the sleep from his eyes. For a couple of seconds he just stood there, staring at the ground and breathing in the steam from his coffee. Then he finally mustered the energy to actually drink the stuff. "What time is it?" 

Uhura glanced back at the clock on the wall and answered, "Almost noon." Then she made her way over to the toaster, getting there just as two slices of sourdough popped out. She took them and set them on a plate, where a small stack of toast already existed, and put in two more slices. "The others are in the dining room, if you want to go sit down. Breakfast is almost done."

Bones mumbled a thanks and shuffled out of the kitchen, dropping into a seat at the table and paying very little attention to the conversation the others were indulging themselves in. Breakfast was brought out not long after that. Glorious, heavenly plates of bacon, toast, sausage, and pancakes. Bones had gone through two cups of coffee by then, and he was just starting a third, so he was glad to finally be more awake. It would be harder to appreciate their wonderful breakfast if he was still two thirds asleep. 

"I think I drank too much last night," Ben commented, in response to something Gary had mentioned. "I don't remember anything after Pavel tried to fight that house plant."

"Zat is not what happened," Chekov interjected through a mouthful of sausage. He just seemed even more indignant as everyone at the table broke out into less than subtle laughing fits. 

"That definitely happened," Scotty said. "I had to hold you back."

"Did not happen," Chekov insisted.

"Oh, it did."

"Did not."

"Did."

"Did no-"

"It is okay, I got it on the video," Jaylah said, sounding incredibly proud of herself and already pulling her phone out of her pocket. They all leaned in to watch the video, dissolving into more laughter despite Chekov's protests. It took a lot of arguing on Chekov's part to stop Jaylah from posting the video onto her Instagram.

* * *

By the time breakfast was over almost everyone had left already. Chekov left with Scotty and Jaylah, saying something about playing a few rounds of Mario Kart. Then Hikaru and Ben left, graciously thanking Gaila and Uhura for throwing the party before they went out the door. Gaila made a comment about needing to pick up milk before she, too, made her way out. Bones was helping Uhura stack the dishes to bring them into the kitchen before leaving, trying to ignore Jim and Gary's arguing in the living room. He couldn't really hear what they were saying, but he could tell it wasn't a very pleasant conversation. Then, most of them weren't with those two. 

He was setting one of the last dishes in the dishwasher when Uhura walked into the kitchen, and they exchanged similar looks. "I don't see how they haven't broken up yet," Uhura said softly, not needing to specify who she was referring to. 

Bones sighed as he took a stack of plates from Uhura and added those to the dishwasher. "Jim doesn't break up with people," he told her, allowing a hint of cynicism to leak into his voice as he said it. It was difficult to understand how a guy like Jim, who would literally fight anyone that was mean to _other_ people, would let someone treat  _him_ poorly. He shut the dishwasher and added dryly, "It's a thing with him."

"We should do something," Uhura said, her tone decisive and slightly noble. 

"Jim doesn't want us to do anything, Nyota. Besides, what would we even do?" It wasn't like he hadn't put extensive thought into this already. Bones wanted to help Jim, he desperately did. But he couldn't say anything to Gary without potentially endangering Jim, and he didn't think he could talk Jim into leaving Gary. Their options were incredibly limited, and it frustrated the hell out of him. 

Uhura looked like she was about to say something, but whatever it was got interrupted by the sound of the front door opening and then slamming shut. McCoy and Uhura exchanged another set of looks, and a couple of seconds later Jim appeared in the doorway with a half-smile on his face. It might have been convincing to anybody else, but Bones could tell the smile was fake. He could always tell with Jim. "Hey, kid," Bones greeted him. "Everything okay?"

He nodded, then gave a small shrug. "Same old, same old. Gary said thanks for breakfast," he said, this last part directed at Uhura. She just raised her eyebrow at Jim, and Jim rolled his eyes as he leaned against the doorway. Instead of commenting on her skepticism, he asked "Can I help with cleaning up?"

"I'm sure there's bottles and stuff all over the house, if you wanna help pick those up," she said. Then, less than subtly in Bones's opinion, "Where'd Gary get off to, anyway?"

Jim's smile faltered for a second, and Bones would have guessed that he hadn't been expecting them to ask about it. "He had to go to work." 

"Sounded like you guys got in fight," Uhura commented, sounding casual as she leaned against the kitchen counter. McCoy didn't know what he plan was, but he already knew it wasn't going to end well. He knew they had to help Jim, but he wasn't sure this was exactly the right method to go about doing it. Then again, he hadn't thought of a method yet, so he supposed Uhura's way would have to do. Hopefully. 

"You guys heard that, huh?" Jim said with a wince. 

"Slamming door gave it away," Bones said, offering Jim a sympathetic look. 

"For me it was when I walked past and heard him insulting you," Uhura added, folding her arms as she spoke. She hadn't mentioned to Bones that she'd overheard part of their argument and now he wished that she had. He wasn't sure if the actual words would make him more or less angry than whatever guesses his head was supplying. "Does he always talk to you like that?"

Jim ran one of his hands through his hair, taking in a deep breath and then letting it out very slowly. As his arm dropped back down to his side he said, "I don't know what you heard, but he didn't mean it, okay." But it sounded to McCoy like Jim was trying to convince himself of that just as much as he was trying to convince them. "Gary's just under a lot of stress right now." 

That was one of the least convincing defenses that Bones had heard in awhile, and he was sure Jim must have known that. "Stress isn't an excuse for being a dick," Uhura said bluntly. 

"Look, I get you're looking out for me, and thanks, really. But it's fine," Jim said, raising his eyebrows earnestly. "I'm used to it. Besides, it's not like anything he said wasn't true."

"In what way is  _I'm used to it_ supposed to reassure us?" Bones asked. "You don't have to let him treat you like that, you know."

"Treat me like what?"

"You can't honestly tell me that if it was a guy treating me that way you wouldn't be mad as hell," Uhura insisted. "And the worst part is, he's somehow manipulated you into thinking you deserve it."

Bones knew she wasn't wrong, and that was a big part of what frustrated him so much. Jim would never allow for one of his friends--or even a stranger, if he knew about it--to be treated so poorly by anyone, let alone somebody they were in a relationship with. But for some reason, Jim didn't care about his own suffering nearly as much as he cared about literally everyone else's. "He's abusive," Bones stated. 

"No. He's never hit me."

"He doesn't have to." 

They were all three quiet for what felt like a long time, but couldn't have been more than a minute. Jim was biting his lip, purposely avoiding looking at either Bones or Uhura. He uncrossed his arms for a second but then folded them again. Bones thought that they might have gotten through to him, but it quickly became clear that he'd thought too soon. "No," Jim said, shaking his head. "I appreciate you guys trying to look out for me, but you're wrong."

Uhura sent a helpless look in McCoy's direction before looking back to Jim. "We're not wrong, Jim, come on, you have to see it," she said, pushing off the counter to take a small step in his direction. 

"I know he's not the most caring guy in the world, but..." Jim trailed off, either not knowing how to complete the sentence, or just not wanting to. 

"Then why do you stay with him?" 

"I don't wanna talk about this anymore."

"Jim."

"Nope," Jim said. He didn't say anything else, or listen to anything else they tried to say, he just turned around and walked out. The door opened and closed to quietly that they almost didn't hear it. 

Uhura and McCoy just stood there for a couple of minutes after he left, not sure of what to say. Bones had known that their effort wasn't going to end well, but he was hoping that he would be wrong. He was sure they hadn't done all that they could to help Jim, but he wasn't sure what they were supposed to do differently. He breathed out a heavy sigh and turned to Uhura. "What do we do now?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i finally updated in a timely manner. how did i do it?  
> as usual, thanks for reading! sorry if i gave you emotions, but also, not sorry because that's exactly what i wanted to do.


	8. Chapter 8

After the argument with Bones and Uhura—he didn't want to call it an argument, but he couldn't find another word that fit—Jim didn't talk to either of them much for a couple of weeks. He wasn't exactly ignoring them, but he was hoping to avoid having them try to bring the same subject up again. He wasn't mad at them, either. Jim could see that they were his friends and, as such, were just trying to look out for him. 

But they were wrong about Gary. They had to be. 

"Are you even listenin' ta me?"

Jim was snapped out of his wandering thoughts by Scotty's voice. He blinked, trying to remember what the last thing his friend had said was. They were at In'N'Out trying to go over some last minute Physics homework, but Jim was having some difficulty focussing on the numbers. His mind kept traveling back to the conversation—that sounded way better than argument—that he'd had with Bones and Uhura. It had been at least three weeks since then, he didn't understand why he couldn't get their words out of his head, but they refused to let him be. Even when the two friends themselves hadn't breached the issue again, Jim's brain couldn't let it go. 

Jim shook his head and glanced across the table at Scotty. "Sorry, man, I'm a bit out of it today. What were you saying?"

"I was askin' when the essay was due," Scotty said, speaking around the straw of his milkshake. 

"Next week," Jim replied automatically. Then he frowned and looked down at the table, adding, "Wait, what day is it?"

"Monday."

"This week."

"Ya haven' started yet, have you?"

"Absolutely not." 

"Tha's just typical."

Jim laughed at that, picking a couple fries off his plate. He meant to start the essay yesterday, but he'd gotten distracted by Netflix, and then going out for dinner with Gary, and plans changed then so he didn't even go back to his dorm that night. Not that he was complaining about that. "How far have you gotten with your essay?" he asked Scotty, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table. 

Scotty shrugged. "I got about halfway, an' then I quit to play Mario Kart." 

"That's just typical," Jim mimicked Scotty's remark from earlier. 

"At least I started mine, laddie," Scotty said with a laugh. 

Jim smiled and shook his head, and they got back to discussing the intricacies of Physics problems. Scotty was, admittedly, more suited to the subject than Jim was, but between the two of them they managed to get all the homework done in no time at all. Or, it felt that way, anyways. But when they had finished their homework, and their burgers, they stepped outside only to discover that it was already dark out. 

Upon checking their phones, they discovered that it was nine o'clock already. Sure, they had only gotten to In'N'Out a little after seven, but they hadn't been expecting to spend two hours on Physics problems. Not that they were on topic for the whole two hours, but that wasn't really the point. 

"Welp," Jim said, stuffing his hands into his jacket pockets. "Nothing else to do now, I vote we go get drinks." 

"Tha's why we're such good friends, Jim."

* * *

Half an hour later found them at a small bar not unreasonably far away. They decided to invite some of the others, but most of their friends were too busy or too sensible to want to get drinks on a Monday night, with classes the next day. In the end it was just Jim, Scotty, Jaylah, Chekov, and Gary. They had more or less predicted those results when sending out their invite texts because, excluding Bones, those were basically the heaviest drinkers in the group. And Bones was, at least, a more reasonable heavy drinker than the others. 

Their night started off with Chekov and Scotty debating over whether Scotch or Vodka was a better drink, which had to be an argument they'd had a hundred times before. Jim had ordered a tequila, which he drank while watching the two argue intensely. He didn't think he'd ever seen two (for the time being) sober people get so angry over drinks before. He and Jaylah placed bets on who would give first. 

That was about when Gary showed up, dropping into the stool next to Jim with a slight nod in acknowledgement of the others. "Hey, babe," he said, greeting Jim with a small kiss. They pulled away from one another for about a second before kissing again, a lot more than just a greeting this time. 

They broke apart when they heard Chekov stage whisper, "I guess they're not fighting anymore." Jim shot him an unamused look, and Chekov gave him the same innocent grin that he probably gave his parents when he stole a cookie from the jar. 

"What were you fighting about, James T?" Jaylah asked over her beer. 

"What  _were_ we fighting about?" Jim asked, turning to Gary with his head tilted to the side a little. He didn't even remember the last thing they'd been arguing over, just that they had been arguing a few days ago. 

"You punched some guy and got us banned from Target, of all places," Gary said flatly. A waitress brought over a tray as he was speaking and set a few more drinks down at their table, including another vodka for Chekov, a beer for Gary, and an unreasonable number of shots for Jaylah and Jim. 

Jim laughed as he remembered the incident Gary mentioned. "I remember now," Jim said, still chuckling a little as he took a shot. Gary rolled his eyes and smiled reluctantly, which was good, because it meant they weren't about to argue twice over the same thing. Jim turned to the others, who all three had a mix of inquisitive and unimpressed looks on their faces. He held up an index finger in their direction and said, "He was being a dick, and he started it."

"Not with  _you_ ," Gary put in, chuckling. 

"Well, no," Jim admitted, taking another shot. He grimaced as he smacked the little glass back down on the table with a  _clunk_. "But I couldn't just stand there and do nothing, could I?"

"That's what everyone else was doing."

"I know, and it pissed me off. I'm a little sad we didn't get the milk, though."

"We  _got_ the milk. But what'd you do with it?"

"Shut up."

Chekov frowned, leaning forward a little to rest his arms on the table. "There's a story here, and you're not telling it," Chekov said, a little smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. Jaylah, who had just taken three shots impressively quickly, nodded her agreement. "I vish you vould tell it."

Again, Jaylah nodded her agreement. 

"Not much of a story, really," Jim said, shrugging his shoulders lightly. "We were at Target, because  _someone_ keeps forgetting to buy milk, and you can't make buttermilk pancakes without milk, right? So we go to Target to buy milk, get the milk, and are on our way to check out when we see these two guys fighting. Well, not so much fighting, as this one giant asshole was beating up some tiny nerd guy. So, I did what any  _reasonable_ person would do, and intervened."

"By 'intervene,' he means he threw a half gallon of milk at the bigger guy, and then punched him in the face."

"Actually, I threw the milk, got punched in the face, and  _then_ punched him."

"You got us banned from Target, Jim."

"Worth it." 

"You don't think your approach may have been a bit stupid?" 

"Your approach was to do nothing," Jim countered, mimicking the passive aggressive anger that he'd picked up in Gary's voice. 

They both rolled their eyes and, almost in sync, Jim took another shot and Gary took a swig of his beer. 

There was a tense silence, but it only lasted for a couple of seconds before Scotty pointedly cleared his throat and changed the subject. They talked about why their other friends couldn't come for awhile—Bones had a paper, Uhura and Spock had a date, all stuff like that. That line of conversation got boring after awhile, and they soon switched to discussing a new sci-fi film that had come out recently. 

Scotty and Chekov, who had finally put aside their differences regarding alcohol preferences, quickly got to debating about scientific accuracy in the movie. Jim and Jaylah weighed in their opinions on the subject for a few minutes, then lost interest, their attention turning back to alcoholic drinks and really bad jokes. 

"Oh, oh! James T! I have one!" Jaylah exclaimed, perhaps a little louder than normal, drumming her hands on the table with excitement. Jim nodded, turning all his attention towards her, as she clearly thought this joke was one of her better ones. "Tell me. Why you should never trust an atom?"

He took a couple of sips from the scotch he had been talked into ordering as he thought, then set the glass down and shook his head, admitting defeat. "I dunno, why should you never trust an atom?"

"Because, they make up everything!"

Jaylah burst out laughing at her own joke, and Jim and Scotty both joined in. Chekov giggled a little, but he was too distracted making flirtatious looks at a girl across the room to really appreciate how good the joke was. In the meantime, Gary took a much longer sip from what was probably his fourth beer, breathing out a heavy sigh as he set his glass back down. 

The motion caught Jim's eye, and then he picked up Gary's glass and moved it over an inch so that it was resting on the coaster instead of the wooden table. "You gotta use the coaster, Gare-bear," he said, shaking his head in disapproval. "You don't wanna stain this nice table, do you?" 

"Did you just call me Gare-bear?"

"Shhh. Coaster. It's disrespectful not to use the coaster." 

"Oh, like it was disrespectful to the Target employees to throw that half gallon of milk?" 

"Hey! I offered to clean it up, but they told me to get out of the store!" Jim answered.

Before any further argument could break out, Chekov distracted the pair of them by slamming his empty glass down on the table with a lot of conviction. Jim glanced down at the glass and gave Chekov two thumbs up, as he had set it down on a coaster, and not on the table like some sort of barbarian. He wasn't aware he had said that out loud until Gary jokingly elbowed him in the side. 

Chekov didn't seem that interested in the coaster discourse, though. His attention was focussed on the girl across the room that he'd been making faces at for the past few minutes. "I am going to buy her a drink," Chekov announced, pushing out his stool so he could get up. "See where things go from zere." 

"Go get 'em, laddie!" Scotty said, slapping Chekov on the back. 

Chekov left with the girl like, five minutes later. Soon after that, Jaylah and Scotty announced that they had to head back to their apartment. Apparently their neighbor, who was babysitting their dog Keenser, said something came up and they had to go get their dog back. Their friends having left, Jim and Gary only had one more drink before deciding to take an Uber back to Gary's apartment. 

* * *

It was eerily silent in the apartment building when they got there, all the other tenants having either gone to bed or at least settled into their nightly routines. The clock on Gary's kitchen wall read 12:29 AM, but the clock had always been somewhat slow, so Jim wasn't sure exactly what time they had gotten home. He did know they'd stayed out longer than he had initially planned when suggesting drinks to Scotty, as he had a morning class to go to the next day. 

After glancing at the clock, Jim shrugged off his jacket, dropping it onto the couch. Then he found the outlet by the window and plugged his phone into the charger just as the battery dropped to 5%. He noticed a couple of texts waiting in his notifications, and a few missed calls, but he figured those could wait until another time, setting the phone down on the windowsill. He was about to walk away when he got distracted looking out the window. It was a fairly clear night, and while there weren't a lot of stars visible from in the city, what you could see was a lot prettier when the sky was clear. There was a crescent moon that night. 

"Moon looks like a toenail," Jim commented, smiling widely. "Beautiful toenail." 

"Why are you like this?" 

"Baby, I was born this way," Jim answered. He heard Gary sigh in response, but chose to ignore it as he drummed his fingers against the windowsill to the tune of the song. Under his breathe, and highly off-key, he sang, "I'm on the right track baby I was born this way..."

"God, you're annoying."

"So you've told me."

 

 

"What's that supposed to mean?" 

Jim turned his attention away from the stars, spotting Gary across the living room. He was hanging up both their jackets on the coat hanger by the door, so his back was to Jim and Jim couldn't tell whether Gary was actually angry or just joking around. He shrugged to himself and turned his gaze back to the window, watching the toenail moon and sparse scattering of city stars. 

There was a hand tugging at his elbow. Jim ignored it for a second, but when he didn't turn around as the hand was indicating, Gary yanked on his arm to turn him around. He didn't let go of Jim's elbow as he looked down at Jim. When he saw Gary's face he immediately made up his mind that Gary had been actually angry and not just joking around. "Why don't you answer me when I ask you a question?"

Jim jerked his arm out of Gary's grip. "I dunno, why do you keep tugging me around like a ragdoll?"

"I'll do a lot more than that if you keep ignoring me like that," Gary snapped. He clenched his fists at his sides, and Jim subconsciously took a step back, folding his arms across his chest. "What the hell's so interesting out my window, anyway?"

"I was just...looking."

"Well, stop looking. It's fucking weird." 

"Looking out the window is weird?  _How_ is looking out the window weird?" Jim asked, dropping his arms back to his side. "Y'know, I'm starting to think you're just looking for ways to criticize me now. Looking out the window is weird?"

Gary rolled his eyes and turned around, walking towards the kitchen. "You're drunk, Jim," he said as he walked. "We'll talk about this when you're feeling a bit more reasonable. Maybe you can finally start acting like an adult, instead of an adolescent." 

Jim opened his mouth to fire back some other insult, but shut it again when he couldn't think of one. "You're acting like an adolescent," Jim grumbled, turning to look back out the window. He stopped halfway, though, because Gary stopped walking towards the kitchen to turn back to Jim with a disbelieving look on his face. Jim raised his eyebrows expectantly, waiting for whatever angry outburst Gary was about to have. He was expecting yelling, or insults, or some combination of the two. It was usually some combination of the two. 

Instead, Gary just folded his arms across his chest. "Jim, how many people did you date before me?"

The question caught him off guard, so he just answered, "I dunno, about 15?"

"They left you, or you left them?"

"They...They left me. Why?"

"Ever think it might be your fault?" 

The honest answer to that question was: Yes, all the time. Jim didn't say that, though. He didn't say anything. 

Gary shook his head and turned around, stalking off into the kitchen to get a glass of water. Jim bit his lip and went to check his phone, feeling that it was only a matter of time before he ruined things with Gary just like he had with everyone else. 


	9. Chapter 9

It was a hot day out. They hadn't had one like this in months, actually, with the sun shining through a mostly clear blue sky, an occasional fluffy white cloud scattered here and there. The plants all seemed greener than the past few weeks, too. It was these nice conditions that brought Jim running into the dorm room at about 11:42am, enthusiastically suggesting they go and do their homework out on the Quad (which was basically a campus park in the middle of the four main lecture halls. There was usually about twenty students hanging out there, either doing work or throwing a football around. Jim sometimes joined them, but Bones almost never did.)

Bones was reluctant at first, what with allergy season and the lack of charging outlets on the Quad, but Jim's good moods had been getting rarer lately so Bones didn't want to ruin it today. 

About twenty minutes later, Bones and Jim found themselves sitting under a huge oak tree on the Quad, sandwiches and composition books sprawled out on the grass around them. Jim had taken out his phone and set it on top one of the textbooks he wasn't using, setting it up so that the speakers played one of those lofi hip-hop stations. It was more mellow than the music Jim usually blasted, and Bones appreciated the concentration it allowed him.

"I think Archer is trying to kill me," Jim complained as he flipped through the pages of his textbook, turning them far too quickly to actually be reading a single word on any of them. He started to tap the tip of his pen against his teeth as he searched, subconsciously nodding along to his music. Then he said, "He's eagerly awaiting my slow and painful death."

"If you were  _my_ student, I'd want you dead, too," Bones said dryly, barely glancing up from where he was trying to find a blank page in his notebook. He didn't have to look up to picture the mock-scandalized face Jim was making in response to the joke. He realized he should have looked up, however, when a crumpled up piece of paper bounced off of his forehead. He picked up the paper and looked at it for a second, then looked up at Jim, who offered him the most satisfied of shit-eating grins. Bones rolled his eyes and threw the paper back, chuckling as it landed atop Jim's head and stayed there, in his hair. "Infant."

"Thank you."

"Shut up." 

They both laughed and turned their attention back to their own respective ~~suffering~~ homework. 

As it turned out, sitting outside and doing classwork with Jim turned out to be oddly relaxing. The music Jim's phone was humming was fairly mellow, the grass was more comfortable than expected, and it was nice to actually spend time with Jim again, even if they were focussed more on homework than conversation. No one had seen much of Jim for the past few weeks; he'd been spending most of his time with Gary, and on the odd day where he actually spent time in their dorm room, Bones had noticed that Jim seemed either stressed out or exhausted. Today was the first time in awhile that Jim seemed genuinely at peace.

Bones shook his head, turning his thoughts away from Jim and back towards his homework. He got to do that for all of two minutes before his concentration was broken by sudden shouting, which it took him a bit too long to realize was coming from Jim's phone. It became apparent a second later that the shouting was actually just the Beastie Boys, Jim's ringtone. Jim glanced up from where he'd been furiously scribbling the answer to a physics problem, his gaze settling on where his phone lay a few feet away, and he dove towards it to pick it up. Bones just caught a glimpse of the number on the screen, one that the caller ID apparently didn't recognize, before Jim dove towards it and picked it up. He looked at the number for a second, then accepted the call and answered, "Houston Crematorium, you kill 'em, we grill 'em! How can I help you?" 

Bones suppressed a laugh at that, deciding to roll his eyes instead. Jim had to stop answering unknown numbers like that, one of these days it would be an important phone call, and not just some telemarketer. 

Whoever was on the other end of the phone said something Bones didn't quite catch, and Jim replied, "Yeah, this is Jim Kirk. What's going on?"

Apparently, 'one of these days' had come sooner than Bones expected. As the person on the phone spoke, the easy smile written across Jim's face dropped. He ran his free hand through his hair, the look on his face slowly becoming more worried as the speaker continued. Bones bit back on asking what was happening, not wanting to interrupt anything, but growing more concerned by the second. 

Jim moved to hold the phone between his shoulder and ear, using his now free hands to begin haphazardly packing up his books and things into his backpack. Bones observed him for a second, then followed suit, putting his own notebooks and papers back into his bag. Once packed up, Jim slung his backpack over his shoulders and got to his feet, pausing to hold out a hand to help Bones up. He took it, and the two of them were barely on their feet for five seconds before Jim started off in the direction of the student parking lot. "I'm on my way," Jim said into the phone. Then, almost as an afterthought, "Thanks for calling, ma'am." 

Bones waited a couple of seconds after Jim pocketed the phone before asking, "What was all that about?"

"That was the hospital," Jim said quickly, putting his hands in his pockets and them taking them back out a second later, like he didn't know what to do with himself right then. He settled on readjusting the backpack strap on his shoulder. Anxious fidgeting. "Mom was in an accident. They didn't give me that many details, but it's not good. I gotta get down there." 

"Shit," was all Bones could think to say for a second. Jim was walking so fast it was hard to keep up with him; he was just short of running. They'd already crossed half of the Quad, and they could see the student parking lot in the distance. "Do you want me to come with you?"

The look on Jim's face was difficult to read. "No. You're tutoring today, remember?"

"Jim, I can cancel," Bones said, suppressing the urge to roll his eyes. As if tutoring some kid was more important than this. 

But Jim shook his head. "You need the money."

Technically, that was true. Med school was expensive, food and clothing and all that stuff had to be paid for. Tutoring lessons earned him about fifty bucks an hour, that was why he'd started doing it in the first place. But that didn't mean he couldn't put off one measly lesson, especially if it was because Jim needed his help. He was about to argue this, but Jim seemed to predict his argument, because he shook his head again and insisted, "I'll be fine on my own, Bones. I'll call if there's anything you can do, promise."

"Pinky swear." Bones narrowed his eyes. Pinky swears were usually proposed by Jim, but he figured it was a way to ensure Jim would actually call if anything came up. 

"Pinky swear," Jim repeated, holding out his hand with his pinky outstretched. Their pinkies interlocked and then Jim turned back towards the parking lot, already digging in his pockets for the keys to his motorcycle. "See you later, okay?"

"Bye, kid," Bones said, frowning as he split off to head towards the dorms. He heard the motorcycle start up as he walked away.

* * *

It wasn't until the next day that Jim called him. 

It was half past five in the morning. Under different circumstances, Bones might have complained about that, but as it was he just answered the phone and tried to be less grumpy than he usually was in the mornings. It was difficult to read Jim's emotional state over the phone, but he sounded tired. Bones found out that the hospital staff hadn't immediately been letting anyone into the room, so he'd spent the night asleep in a chair in the waiting room. He'd been let in to his mother about two hours ago, but she wasn't awake more than to say one or two nonsensical sentences. 

Jim wanted to be there for her when she woke up, he said. He was calling Bones to bring him a phone charger, of all things.

It didn't take long to find Jim's charger, and Bones was at the hospital about fifteen minutes later. The receptionist gave him a Visitor's sticker and told him the room number, and he headed right up. He stepped cautiously into the hospital room, and was greeted by about three other people. One of which was a nurse, who was just on her way out when Bones arrived. Jim was sitting in a chair next to his mother's bed, his elbow on the arm of the chair and his head resting in his hand. It looked like he'd fallen asleep there, despite the cup of shitty hospital coffee perched on the other arm of the chair. Meanwhile, and much to McCoy's genuine surprise, Gary was sitting in the chair in the corner by the window, doing something on his phone. 

He looked up when Bones walked in the room, and then held up a finger to shush him, jerking his head in Jim's direction. Bones took a few steps further into the room, carefully picking Jim's phone up off the arm of the chair and plugging it into an outlet in the corner. In an almost-whisper he asked Gary, "How're they doing?"

"Winona's supposed to wake up soon," Gary answered, glancing over at her. Bones followed his gaze. Winona somehow looked both worse and better than Bones had been imagining in her head. She had an IV and heart monitor and all that jazz, stitches above her right eye, and a cast on her left leg. It could have been worse, but it obviously also could've been better. 

"That's good," Bones said, wondering whether he should hang around or leave. "Is Sam around?"

"Flying in," Gary almost sounded bored. "Bringing the wife and Rugrats, too. They should be here tomorrow." 

"How long is Winona expected to stay in-hospital?"

"You're the fucking med student."

While he wasn't exactly shocked at Gary's attitude, he didn't really know how to respond without picking a fight. Right then wasn't really the time for a fight, no matter how much he disliked Gary, so he just bit his tongue and leaned against the counter a few feet away. He didn't really have an excuse for hanging back, but he didn't want to leave without saying something to Jim first. The room was quiet for a long minute, aside from the typical background noise a hospital supplied, and then it was cut off by Gary clearing his throat. Bones reluctantly turned to see what he wanted. "If you're waiting to say something to Jim, you shouldn't bother."

"Why?" He was less curious than irritated, and he didn't bother covering that up in his tone. 

"He doesn't need you," Gary said, tone as if he was just pointing out the obvious. He finally closed whatever he was doing on his phone, setting it down screen facing downwards on the arm of the chair and looking up at Bones. Bones must have looked as indignant as he was feeling, because Gary repeated, "He doesn't need you. I'm here, so you can go take a nap or whatever you do in your spare time." 

"You know you're not the only person in his life, right?" 

"Only one that matters."

"Is this a joke?" 

Gary rolled his eyes and stood up, glancing over at where Jim was still sound asleep before approaching McCoy. "Look, Leonard," Gary said, like he was the authority figure about to tell some ignorant teenager an important life lesson. "You've got this little crush on Jim, and I  _get it_ , I do. But he doesn't need you, he already has a boyfriend. Me. So stop wasting your time on Jim, and go find someone a little more...in your league."

Gary winked and gestured towards the door.

Bones wasn't immediately sure how to answer with that. He wanted to deny having a crush on Jim, but he couldn't think of a way to say it without it sounding like a guilty person trying to sound not guilty. He also wanted to tell Gary that you could care for someone without it having to be romantic affection, or that Gary was a shitty boyfriend, he'd like to tell Gary that, too. He let out a soft sigh of frustration, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his pants. "Gary, I'm not here because of a 'crush,' I'm here because Jim's my  _friend_ , and you're supposed to be there for your  _friends_ when they have family members in the hospital," he said, trying to keep his voice low so he wouldn't disturb either of the Kirks in the room. It was unlikely Winona would notice, what with the state she was in, but he didn't want to risk it. "I'm not trying to take Jim from you, that's ridiculous. I'm being a good friend."

Only half of that last bit was true, he supposed. He didn't really want Gary to be dating Jim, but even that was for Jim's sake. 

"Yeah, you're being a friend," Gary answered. "But you can't deny that you want to be something other than a friend."

"Oh, for fuck's sake."

"Whatever, friend or not, he doesn't need you right now," Gary gestured once more towards the door, then put his hands on his hips. "You should go. I'm here, I'll make sure he's okay."

"Because you're so great at making sure Jim is okay," Bones snapped. He hadn't thought before speaking, and that definitely wasn't what he meant to say, even if it was what he wanted to say.

Gary narrowed his eyes slightly and he didn't say anything for a second. Then he rolled his eyes and let out a long-suffering sigh, as if he were some sort of victim here. "Leonard, you have to stop trying to paint me like some sort of villain," Gary said, sounding one part offended and two parts concerned. "It's not healthy, all of this anger you're projecting on me." 

That wasn't exactly the response Bones had been expecting, even if he didn't know what the response he'd been expecting was. He folded his arms across his chest. "What are you talking about, Gary?"

At that, Gary shook his head, like it should have been obvious. "Clearly, you're jealous of me and Jim, because we're so happy," Gary started, and it took a lot of restraint for McCoy not to immediately laugh at that. Those two? Happy? Not by a mile. But Gary went on before Bones could dwell too long on that. "It's easier for you to think I'm some complete asshole, than to accept that you're just jealous. But this has to stop, man."

It almost worked, it really did. For a second, Bones considered that he might be picturing Gary as worse than he was, out of overprotectiveness or maybe jealousy or some other issue. But he knew that wasn't the case, and all this attempt did was solidify just how much of a manipulative asshole Gary truly was. 

"Alright, cut the crap," Bones said finally, unfolding his arms and restlessly dropping them back to his sides. "You two are 'so happy?' I can't remember a single time I've seen you together that you didn't get into some bullshit fight about something-"

He had more points, but Gary interrupted him. "Sure, we fight, everyone fights. In fact, fighting comes from communication, doesn't it? Which would make ours a healthy relationship, we're just not afraid to disagree with each other," Gary said. Then a smug grin appeared on his face and he added, almost as an afterthought, "Besides, dude, the makeup sex is great." 

Bones huffed out an angry breath of air. "Are you serious right now?"

Gary had just opened his mouth to respond when there was a shuffling sound from the other side of the room. They both stopped and turned towards the hospital bed and the chair next to it, probably both wondering if Jim was awake and how much of their argument he had overheard. It looked like Jim had just woken up, as he had only just lifted his head off of his hand when Bones turned around. 

He looked around the room for a second before his gaze settled on where Bones and Gary were standing in front of the window. "Hey, Bones," he said, bringing up a hand to rub the sleep from his eyes. "What's going on? Are you guys fighting?"

"No," they answered in unison.

Jim appeared skeptical, but he must of been too tired to argue, because he just shook his head at them and turned to move the cold-by-now coffee cup onto the floor, where it was less likely to get knocked over. Gary smiled warmly at him and held his arms out. Jim yawned as he got up and, looking still half asleep, stumbled over in their direction and collapsed tiredly into Gary's hug. 

Gary rested his chin on the top of Jim's head, and he brought up one of his arms to rub comfortingly at Jim's back. Then he looked over at Bones and flashed a wolfish grin, all teeth and smugness, as if to say, "See? He's mine." 

But the smile was gone after a second as he returned his attention to Jim. Jim pulled away from the hug after a moment and took a step back, so the three of them were all standing in a sort of circle. Seeming more awake than he had been a second ago, he said, "Thanks for coming, Bones. Sorry my call woke you up."

"It's no problem, kid," Bones answered, giving a small nod. 

"Thanks, all the same."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so...i took so long to update this?? i'm sorry. i'm busy and i kinda forgot i was writing it? anyway, i'm back! hope y'all like it! thanks a bunch for reading!


	10. Chapter 10

Seeing Sam again was bittersweet.

On the one hand, Jim and his brother hadn't seen one another since their Fourth of July barbecue, which was nearly a year ago. Sam had been working in a research lab in San Francisco, and it was honestly awesome just to be in the same state as him, let alone face to face. On the other hand, though, these weren't exactly the best of circumstances. jim could be ecstatic to see his brother in any other situation, but an unconscious mother in the hospital? That didn't exactly leave a lot of room for their usual ear-reaching grins and overly enthusiastic bear hugs. 

Still, when the two brothers spotted each other in the hospital parking lot, they fell just short of running to greet each other; no time for greetings as they pulled one another into a brotherly hug. Jim held onto the comfort of the hug for just a second longer than he wanted, before pulling away to envelop his sister-in-law in a smaller hug of her own. He had just opened his mouth to say something to them when his attention was pulled away by an insistent tugging at the sleeve of his flannel. His nephew Peter, four years old and likely unaware of the seriousness of why his family had flown to Iowa all of a sudden, was smiling widely at him. "Uncle Jim! Uncle Jim!"

"Hey, you," Jim answered, returning Peter's smile warmly. He knelt down so he was at eye-level with the kid, "I missed you, little man. How ya been?"

"I lost a tooth!" Peter said, opening his mouth and indicating the gap where a tooth was indeed missing. 

"Where'd you see it last? Did you try retracing your steps?" Jim joked, earning a laugh from his nephew. 

"Piggyback," Peter said suddenly, holding his arms out towards Jim. Jim grinned and lifted Peter up, setting him on his shoulders and standing back up. He kept his hands on Peter's feet just to make sure the kid didn't fall, then lead the way towards the hospital entrance. Sam and his wife Aurelan, Arri for short, followed after him, mostly quiet as they walked. 

The receptionist stopped them on the way in, giving them  _Visitor's_ stickers and telling them the way to Winona's room despite Jim knowing the path by heart already. Bones was waiting for them in the hallway with a styrofoam tray of coffee, the label luckily belonging to someplace other than the hospital cafeteria. Jim gave Bones a one-armed hug, Peter still on his shoulders, and took one of the coffees from the tray, taking a long sip. "You're a saint, Bones," Jim said, keeping the cup close to his face and soaking in the comfort that its warmth brought. He gestured towards his family with the hand holding the coffee, wanting to keep his other hand on Peter's foot to stop him falling. "Bones, this is my big bro Sam, his lovely wife Arri, and my favorite nephew, Peter. Folks, this is Bones."

"I'm your only nephew, Uncle Jim," Peter interrupted, resting his chin atop Jim's head. 

"Okay, knowing Jim, Bones is some obnoxious nickname," Sam said, graciously accepting the coffee that Bones offered to him. "What do you actually go by?"

"Leonard McCoy, y'all can call me Leo," Bones answered, offering the third coffee to Arri. 

Sam and Bones shook hands, then the group made their way into the hospital room. There was an almost tangible change in the mood as they stepped inside, the room silent aside from their footsteps and an occasional beeping of machines. Jim lowered Peter back onto the floor, and Peter gripped Jim's hand on his right and Sam's on his left as they approached the bed. 

Despite the doctor's constant promises that Winona was going to wake up soon, she still had yet to even stir. Jim would know, he'd only been talked into leaving the hospital for about two hours before he headed back. 

"What's wrong with Grandma?" Peter's voice broke the silence, uncharacteristically small and fragile. 

Sam didn't seem up to answering, his gaze stuck on his mother's almost lifeless figure lying on the hospital bed. They didn't know because they hadn't been there yesterday, but Winona actually was looking a bit better already. Unless that was Jim's stubborn optimism clouding his judgement again. After a second, Arri turned around to kneel in front of Peter. "Grandma was in an accident, Peter," she explained softly. "But the doctor's are saying she'll be okay. Everything'll be okay."

Jim observed the interaction, but his attention was mostly on Sam, who seemed like the conversation between his wife and child had only bothered him more. Jim wondered whether Winona had said something similar to Sam all those years ago when George Kirk got sent to the ER; when George Kirk never so much as woke up, let alone left that ER. Shit, poor Sam. Jim knew how poorly he was handling the situation, and he'd been a bit estranged from his mom as a kid; it could only be worse for Sam, who'd always gotten along with their mom so well, and for Peter, who probably didn't completely understand what was happening. 

He made a mental note to try and take Peter out for ice cream or something later, cheer the kid up a bit. 

A nurse walked in at that moment, distractedly greeting the family before setting to work checking the monitors and charts set up in the room. "I'm sorry, I know this is a very trying time for the family," she said, sounding sincere in her words, but also saying them like she'd practiced the repetitions countless times before. It had become a part of her duties to console the worried family members, she must have been well rehearsed in the art by now. "Is there anything I can get for you?"

There was a chorus of people shaking their heads in the negative, and a couple of thanks for asking. The nurse had just turned to leave when there was a stirring from the hospital bed and all eyes turned in Winona's direction. Jim took a step closer, silently thankful for the reassuring hand that Bones had placed on his shoulder. 

Winona opened her eyes slowly, taking a couple of tries blinking to get it right, scanning the room with all the energy of spilt molasses. She winced as she tried to sit up, quickly abandoning that effort and settling for resting her head back against the pillow beneath her head. The nurse seemed a bit surprised and she pressed the call button to bring in the doctor, then moved towards hovering around the machines and checking their feeds, glancing back and forth between those and Winona. But the nurse was really just background noise, all the attention in the room was focussed on Winona. 

She wore a pained look on her features, and she seemed torn between relief and shock as he eyes locked on where Jim was standing at her bedside. "George? But I thought you were..." She trailed off, shaking her head slightly. "Is that you, George?"

Jim didn't really know how to answer. It was a strange feeling, being referred to as his father; seeing his mother smile because of the likeness when it was him reminding her of George that had made her push him away all those years ago. Not knowing what to do, he frantically looked back at Bones, then at the nurse, hoping for some kind of cue. He hesitantly took the hand she had uncurled in his direction, shaking his head sadly. "No, mom," he said. "It's just me. Jim." 

And while he was used to having people be disappointed in him for simply being him, he hadn't seen that look on his mom's face in years. The look only flashed across her face for a moment, the disenchantment that Winona must have felt at having to see Jim instead of George, and though it was only a minute it hurt. Jim tried to push that away, the same way Winona pushed the expression away, replacing it with a soft smile. "Sorry, you know how much you look like your father," she said softly, shaking her head ever so slightly. "What happened?"

"You were in an accident," Jim said simply. He wanted to fill her in on all the details, but he honestly didn't know them. "Sam's here, Mom. He flew in from San Fran."

"Takes a near-death experience to get you to visit these days, huh?" She said, glancing over in Sam's direction. There was a slight laugh in her voice that was probably meant to round off the harshness of her words. "Is that Peter I see down there?"

"Hi, Grandma!" Peter confirmed her suspicion with the most cheer in the room. 

They had about three minutes of reunion before the doctor that the nurse had summoned stepped into the room. "Miss Kirk! We weren't expecting you to wake up for another day at least! That accident was pretty bad."

Jim leaned over towards Bones and whispered, "To think, I insulted your bedside manner." And it was kind of reassuring to hear Bones suppress a chuckle, it felt like just another day, which felt like everything was going to be okay after all. 

He must not have suppressed the chuckle as well as he thought, though, because the noise caught Winona's attention. She turned away from the somewhat slow conversation she'd been having with the doctor to look at where Bones was standing beside Jim, one hand still placed comfortingly on his shoulder. For a moment she frowned, then the frown was replaced with a soft smile. "Oh, is this Gary?" She asked, indicating Bones. 

"No, no, no," Jim answered, shaking his head. 

"God no," Bones said, sounding almost offended that anyone would relate him to Gary. He probably was, knowing his opinions about Gary. Jim wished the two of them would get along better, they were two of the most important people in his life at the moment. Bones offered a smile in Winona's direction, all Southern charm, and said, "Leonard McCoy, pleasure to meet you, ma'am."

"Leonard. Leonard..." Winona said, sounding like she was trying to place the name. "Oh, yeah, Jim calls you Bones. I've heard a lot about you."

"Jim, I can't believe you've infected your whole family with the infantile nickname," Bones said, but there was no harshness in his words.

"It's a good nickname, Bones," Jim answered, smiling. Winona smiled, too, and for the first time in the past forty-two hours, Jim felt like his mother was actually going to be okay. It wasn't just his stubborn optimism, Winona would pull through because she, too, was a stubborn Kirk. 

They were allowed to have about fifteen more minutes together, the family, before the doctor ushered them all out, insisting that Winona needed her rest. She protested, saying she'd gotten more than enough rest in the past day, but the protest was all show, Jim could tell how tired she really was. He managed to lure Peter out with the promise of ice cream, and everyone else followed, saying quick and slightly more emotional than they'd like to admit goodbyes to Winona. 

* * *

"How's your mom?" 

"She woke up today. We actually got to talk for a bit, it was nice." 

"Thank god, the drama's almost over." 

Jim chose to ignore the remark, not wanting to pick another fight. 

He was in the kitchen in Gary's apartment, cooking the two of them dinner with the practiced expertise of someone who learned to cook entirely from experience and YouTube videos. Gary, meanwhile, was on the couch channel surfing. As the apartment was set up, there were no walls separating the two rooms and they were close enough together to basically be the same one, so the two of them were having their conversation from their own ends of the apartment, barely having to raise their voices to be heard. 

"Speaking of drama," Jim said, wanting to change the subject. "Did I tell you what happened with Bones and Spock the other day?"

"Babe, I'm gonna need more than that to know whether you told me or not." 

"Me and Spock were playing chess, and Bones decided he wanted to play against Spock," Jim began, cracking an egg over the frying pan and smiling as he remembered the story. "And I know Bones is wicked smart, but he just wasn't meant for chess, so obviously he loses to Spock, who is a badass when it comes to chess. Then they start bickering, 'cause that's how they do, and Bones is like: You know what'd be a good idea? If a flicked this chess piece at Spock's head. And he does, but Spock dodges it, somehow? And the piece flies right past his head, and hits someone who happens to be walking by on the Quad. Guess who he hit? Christine Chapel. It was hilarious."

While it was, admittedly, funnier if you were there, Jim had hoped the story would get more than a chuckle out of Gary. The background noise changed to classical music as Gary swapped channels once again, and Gary said with a laugh, "I'd throw a chess piece at Chapel too, to be honest. What a bitch."Jim sighed as he cracked another egg, torn between defending his friend and avoiding another fight. It had been an emotionally taxing day, to be honest, and he didn't really want to deal with even a small argument, and knowing how small arguments tended to escalate...His mind was made up for him, though, as Gary heard the sigh. "What?"

"I didn't say anything," Jim tried.

"I know an irritable sigh when I hear one, babe," Gary said, flicking the television to another station. 

"Yeah, okay," Jim said. He glanced away from the food for a moment to see if Gary was really angry, but it was hard to tell with Gary's back to him. "It's just that Christine is my friend, and also a really amazing, caring person, and I don't really get why you're calling her a bitch." 

"What, I'm not allowed to have opinions anymore?" 

"That's not what I sai-"

"Y'know, you're so eager to defend Christine fucking Chapel, but you don't defend me like that when your friends talk shit about me, do you?"

"Okay, that's not really true, nor is it the point."

"What  _is_ the point? Christine's a bitch, that's my opinion," Gary answered, picking the remote back up and either pausing or muting the television. Jim wasn't sure, as he was carefully trying to focus on the food he was trying to cook, but he heard the background noise of the t.v. cut off. It probably wasn't a good sign, Gary pausing his channel surfing. It meant they were having an argument, which is exactly what Jim had been trying to avoid. "Besides, Jim, haven't you noticed what your supposed  _friends_ have been doing? Insulting me behind my back whenever they can? They're trying to push me away from you, and you won't even defend me to them. Can't you see your friends aren't as great as you think they are?"

"That's not true," Jim said, softly but firmly, eyes trained on the eggs as they slowly cooked, heading towards burning if nothing was done. 

While Gary wasn't facing Jim and Jim was stubbornly not looking at Gary, he could picture the expression on Gary's features. Eyebrows drawn closer together, as if preparing to fight if they met in the center of his forehead. Lips pressed together in a line. Jim didn't want to fight with his boyfriend, their night was supposed to be a good one. He needed one relaxing dinner, at least, after all the stress of the past two days. He cleared his throat and said, "I'm sorry. Just, can we not insult my friends, please?"

"I was just trying to look out for you," Gary said, the eye roll apparent in his voice. "I'm sorry I'm such an asshole, Jim. I didn't realize you hated me so much." 

"No, you're not an asshole, Gary, that's not what I meant." The smell of eggs tinged the air of the room, but Jim wasn't really focussed on the food at the moment. "I don't hate you, I really love you. That's not what I was trying to say at all."

"Might not be what you were trying to say. Doesn't make it not what you said." 

Jim sighed, poking half-heartedly at the eggs with a spatula, though this really didn't do anything. 

"I'm sorry," he said, biting his lip momentarily. "I hope you know I love you."

"Funny way of showing it." 

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine, Jimmy," Gary said, and Jim suppressed the wince at the memories that nickname still brought up. Now really wasn't the time to remind Gary about not liking the nickname, though, so he bit his tongue. "I love you, too, babe. I just wish you were easier to love."

Beneath his breath, Jim murmured, "Yeah. Me too." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this took longer than i hoped but shorter than i expected, you feel? anyway, here's your update! as always, thanks so much for reading! your comments and kudos all really mean a lot to me! thx!


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